


The Gingerbread Man

by Caedmon



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Clones, Episode AU: s02e05 Rise of the Cybermen, Episode AU: s02e06 The Age of Steel, F/M, Jealousy, Parallel Universes, Pete's World, Romance, duplicates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-28
Packaged: 2018-07-24 18:50:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7519354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caedmon/pseuds/Caedmon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the Doctor, Rose and Mickey accidentally find themselves in a parallel universe, Mickey isn't the only one that has a twin...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thank you for reading my new multichap!
> 
> Cherazor prompted me several weeks ago asking what would happen if, instead of there being a clone of Mickey, there was a clone of the Doctor. That idea stuck in my imagination and this is the result of that brainstorming. I'm expecting it to be five chapters, but it may go to six. My plan at this moment is to update on Mondays, unless I finish it really quickly, then I'll update every couple/few days.
> 
> This is beta'd by tenroseforeverandever, but every single mistake is mine.  
> Any and all recognizable dialogue comes from Age of Steel/Rise of the Cybermen. I don't own anything.  
> Your kudos and comments keep me writing. Thank you.  
> Prompt me! caedmonfaith.tumblr.com
> 
> Look at this!! Thank you, buffyann23!  
> 

Mickey stood outside the door to the flat that, in his world, had belonged to his grandmother. He raised his hand to knock, then put it down. What if she didn’t know him? What if he didn’t exist in this world, like Rose? What if he was a stranger to her? Could he deal with that?

Yes, he could. It would be worth it to look at his Gran’s beloved face just one more time. 

He raised his hand to the doorknocker, finally ready to knock, when he heard the squeal of tires a little way down the street and jumped, instantly on guard. 

The van screeched to a halt in front of him, and two men wearing ski masks jumped out, charging at him. Mickey barely had time to take a defensive stance before they had him by the arms, frog-marching him towards the van. 

“Oi! You can’t do that! I’m a law-abiding citizen!” he protested.

“Shut it,” a voice growled in his ear, and it sounded somehow familiar. 

Mickey was tossed into the back of the van, the doors behind him slammed, and the van’s tires spun as it sped away. 

One of the men pulled his mask off and looked at Mickey incredulously, with a half-smile. 

“Blimey,” he said. “He’s your twin, Rickey.”

“Shut it.”

The other man, Rickey, pulled his mask off and Mickey sucked in a breath. It was like looking in a mirror.

“He ain’t my twin,” Rickey growled. 

“Who are you?” Mickey demanded. 

“Nevermind me, who are _you_ , tryin’ to visit my Gran?”

“Oi! She’s my Gran!”

The other man, who looked amused by the appearance of a doppelganger, grinned brightly. “Guess that answers it, mate! He’s your brother!”

Rickey didn’t acknowledge him. “Who are you?”

“Mickey Smith,” he said with more defiance than he felt. He was scared, and didn’t mind admitting it to himself. 

“Mickey,” the blond man snorted. “That’s funny. Mickey and Rickey.”

“I said shut it, Jake,” Rickey snarled again. 

The man called Jake clapped Rickey on the shoulder. “Let’s just take him back to base. Let Benjamin have a go at him. Benjamin will be able to sort it all out.”

“Who’s ‘Benjamin’? Where are you taking me?”

Rickey gave him a malevolent sneer. “You’ll see.”

~*~O~*~

Mickey was frog-marched again, this time into the large kitchen of a house. Rickey pulled out a pistol and aimed it at Mickey, who blanched. 

“No problems here, mate,” Jake said, still cheerful. “You’ll be alright. Just strip to your skivvies and have a seat in this chair right here.”

Mickey wanted to tell them that he’d do no such thing until he had some answers, but the gun in his face kept his mouth firmly shut. Rickey’s eyes were angry, hard, and Mickey was afraid of antagonizing him too much. He didn’t want any trouble, and his time with the Doctor and Rose had demonstrated that if he did what he was asked, kept his head down, they’d show up eventually to bail him out of trouble. So he removed his clothes, down to his boxer briefs, and had a seat in the offered chair.

“Bloody hell, even his _tattoo_ is the same!”

“Tie him up,” Rickey ordered. Jake smirked, but did as asked. 

The driver of the van, a white-haired, kind-faced lady strode into the room carrying a laptop. “Benjamin will be down in just a bit. He’s tinkering.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Moore,” Rickey said without taking his eyes off Mickey. He circled around the man in the chair, eyeing him up and down. 

Jake walked over to him, scanning him with something that looked a bit like the Doctor’s sonic, casting a blue light over various parts of his body.

“He’s clean,” Jack proclaimed. “No bugs.”

“But this is off the scale,” Rickey said in a voice that would have sounded awed had it not also been angry. “He’s flesh and blood. How did that happen?”

Mrs. Moore shrugged, even though she didn’t look up. “Could be that Cybus has perfected the science of human cloning.” She gave Rickey a sly look. “Or your father had a bike.”

Rickey ignored her. “And your name is ‘Mickey’, not ‘Rickey’.” It was a statement, but Mickey answered it like a question.

“Mickey. M’dad was Jackson Smith. Used to work for the key cutters down on Clifton’s Parade. Went to Spain, never came back.”

Rickey’s jaw clenched and he worked his lips into an angry scowl, bending down to Mickey’s level. “But that’s my dad. So, what? We’re brothers?”

Jake looked amused by the proceedings. “Be fair. What else could it be?”

“I don’t know. But he doesn’t just look like me, he is _exactly_ the same. There’s gotta be something else going on here, Jake.”

“Let Benjamin sort it out. He’ll know what’s going on.”

“Benjamin?” Mickey asked, a little bit panicked. “Who are you lot? Who’s Benjamin?”

Rickey stared at him malevolently. “We? We’re the Preachers. As in Gospel Truth. You see? No earpods. While the rest of the world downloads from Cybus Industries, we’ve got _real_ freedom. And Benjamin is London’s Most Wanted.”

Mickey did not like the sound of that at all. Not one bit.

“Look,” Mickey began, “I’m sure there’s an explanation for this. I’m not from around here, see? I’m from another Earth. A parallel Earth. We fell through a...I don’t know…a wormhole or crack in the universe or something, but we mean no harm! We’ll be leaving tomorrow at two, and you’ll never hear from us again!”

“We?” Jake sounded politely curious.

“Yeah, we. I came here with my friends, Rose and the Doctor.”

“A likely story,” Rickey sneered. 

“He’s not wearing earpods, Rickey,” Mrs. Moore pointed out reasonably, again without looking up. “Could be on our side. You’d do best to find that out before you do something rash.”

Rickey didn’t look at all pleased with that and glared even harder at Mickey. 

“Mrs. Moore, we got another upload from Gemini,” a very familiar voice called from the corridor. “Could you pull it up?”

Mrs. Moore’s fingers clicked along the keys of the computer and the voice’s owner strolled into the room. 

“Oh!” he said, surprised, then smiled brightly. “Hello! Didn’t see you there.” He looked back and forth between Rickey and Mickey, a little nonplussed. “Are we having a party? Rickey, you didn’t tell me you have a brother!”

“I don’t,” Rickey grumbled. “Claims he’s from a ‘parallel universe’ or some rot.”

“Is that so! Oh, now, that is very interesting. Very interesting, indeed! Entire bucketfuls of interesting.” Benjamin slipped a pair of glasses from the inside pocket of his jacket and came over to investigate the man tied to the chair as if he were an interesting specimen. “Clean of bugs, I take it?”

“Scanned him myself,” Jake answered.

Benjamin continued to assess a stunned Mickey. “A parallel universe! Parallel universes are a popular theory, and widely believed to be a real phenomenon, but there’s never been any evidence to speak of. Until now!” He whipped off his glasses and beamed. “Won’t you just be the hit of the scientific community, my friend! Of course, we’ll have to verify that you really are who you say you are, but that shouldn’t be too hard, hmm? At the very least, you’ll provide an interesting mystery to work out!”

Mickey stared at him, agog, then broke into a wide smile and a little laugh. “Oh, mate. I have a friend that’s going to _love_ to meet you.”

~*~O~*~

Rose stood at the mirror in the loo of the Tyler mansion, patting down her hair and straightening her uniform. She leaned forward, into the mirror, and touched various places around her face to smooth out her makeup, then sighed and stood back.

This is not how she’d expected meeting her parents to go. 

Her father was rich, _filthy_ rich from the looks of his house. He looked very much the same as he had a year ago in 1987 when she saw him marry her mother, perhaps a bit older. But that was to be expected, she supposed. This was many years after 1987, even in this world. No matter how much older he looked, Rose thought he was handsome and talking to him had been...comfortable.

On the other hand, there was her mother. She’d seen her mother come down the stairs, resplendent in an evening gown, and had nearly caught her breath. Jackie Tyler - the real Jackie Tyler, her mother - would give her eye teeth to be able to dress up like that and live in such a fantastic house, to host grand cocktail parties. Rose hadn’t gotten the chance to talk to her yet, but she very much wanted to.

 _This_ Jackie wasn’t her mother and _this_ Pete wasn’t her father, not biologically. But they couldn’t be that different, could they? Her dad seemed to be much the same as she remembered him, and he had even remarked on how comfortable he felt talking to her. It would be the same with her mother, once she got a chance to go talk to her, wouldn’t it?

Rose hoped it would. She was determined to get closer to them, to find out whatever she could. With or without the Doctor’s input and approval. 

She scowled a little. _The Doctor_ , she scoffed to herself. He probably wouldn’t care, no matter what she did. He’d found ‘Lucy’ now, after all, and 'Lucy' was certainly plenty to keep him busy and entertained. Even in Rose’s head, she sneered the name of the serving girl. It seemed that since he regenerated, he just couldn’t resist shoving beautiful women in front of her face. First Sarah Jane, then Reinette, and now this … _Lucy_. She’d thought… She’d assumed… Rose sighed and stepped out of the loo into the kitchen to take up her tray again. 

When she’d been with the Doctor before he regenerated, when he was still all broody and wrapped in leather, she’d been sure that he loved her. She’d never doubted it. Once he regenerated, Rose had done her best to accept the changes in him while clinging to the similarities. And although she was sure they still would have run into Sarah Jane if he hadn’t changed and she’d have been hurt by the knowledge that she wasn’t as special to him as she’d wanted to believe, she felt sure that her leather Doctor would have apologized to her - in his way - when all was said and done. 

She felt even more certain that her leather Doctor would never have snogged or... _danced_ with Madame de Pompadour. That wasn’t even a question, really. He just wouldn’t have. And he _certainly_ wouldn’t have bragged about it.

And he’d been a flirt in that first body, but she didn’t believe that he’d currently be across the room, chatting up a beautiful dark-haired woman on the wait staff. 

Rose sighed again, telling herself that he was only doing what they’d planned to do, which was to gather information, then plastered on a smile and started circulating the room with her tray of champagne. It wouldn’t do any good to linger on what had been and what would never be again. This was the Doctor, here and now, and although he didn’t love her anymore, at least they were best mates. She could live with that. 

She’d have to. 

But for now, Rose would have to play the role the Doctor had cast her in. She could do this. She’d pretended to be loads of different people loads of times. She was becoming quite the clever actress.

She brightened her smile as best she could and turned to the President of the United Kingdom. “Champagne, sir?”

~*~O~*~

Rose wiped away the tears that spilled over onto her cheeks. Her mother - no, not her mother, _Jackie Tyler_ \- had been cruel to her. Called her ‘the help’, belittled her. Rose had only been trying to get to know the woman that looked so much like the mother she loved. But this Jackie was obviously _not_ the same woman. 

“ _Who the hell do you think you are?,_ ” her not-mother had sneered at her. _”You’re staff. You’re nothing but staff. You’re just the serving girl, for God’s sake. And you are certainly not getting paid. Don’t you dare talk to me!_ ”

The chill February air cooled the tears falling to her cheeks, leaving twin stripes on her face that felt like ice. 

_Fuck the party_ , she decided. She wasn’t going back inside. 

This had been a bad idea. The Doctor had warned her that this was a gingerbread world, but had she listened?

Did she ever?

She stepped off the veranda to wander the garden a bit, maybe clear her head a little. Rose was certain the Doctor wouldn’t even notice she was gone: he’d been chatting up one of the guests at the party when she sought out her mother. And of course, the guest he was chatting up was beautiful and sophisticated. Just like Reinette. Everything Rose wasn’t. 

The dew was falling, and Rose shivered a bit in the damp and cold. Maybe she’d been a bit rash in her decision not to go back to the party. At least it would be warm in there, and she could make herself scarce. It was really too cold out here for -

“Mickey!”

Relief flooded Rose when she saw the man across the garden, trying to hide behind a hedge with another man. There was a friend here who knew her, knew she wasn’t just a serving girl, and she could _really_ use a hug from him right then. 

She took off across the garden towards him, the tears on her cheeks cooling to nothing, and when she reached him, she threw her arms around his neck.

“Mickey! I wondered where you’d gotten to! I’m so glad you found us…”

The man she was hugging pulled back and sneered at her. “Yeah, no offense, sweetheart, but who the hell are you?”

Rose looked up into his face. His brows were furrowed and lips were pursed, looking at her with angry confusion. He didn’t look at all pleased to see her, but that wasn’t right. The man could be Mickey’s twin, except he looked the way Mickey did when West Ham lost a big match. Disgruntled. Angry. Even when they had rows, Mickey never looked at _her_ that way. But he looked exactly like…

“Where’s Mickey? What have you done with Mickey!”

“Blimey,” the blonde beside the fake Mickey said. “Looks like the clone wasn’t lying.”

“Rose!” 

Mickey’s voice rung out from across the garden, and Rose turned around, wary. He was running across the garden, full-tilt, with another man jogging in his wake at a more leisurely pace. It _looked_ like her Mickey, and his voice was the same...but…

He reached her and wrapped her up in a huge hug. “Benjamin said there’d be trouble at the Tyler mansion tonight, I might have known you’d be in the thick of it.”

“Yeah, well, you know me.” She gave an absent answer, overwhelmed by everything that was happening around her. Mickey hugged her again and she felt some of her confusion melt away. This felt familiar. It felt like Mickey. 

“Rose, this is Jake and Rickey.”

“Rickey?” she asked, looking at the other man curiously. “Blimey, Mickey, you look just alike.”

“Yeah, but that’s not the biggest surprise, Rose.”

He took a step back, and Rose looked towards the fourth man, who had finally made his way up to the group. Her eyes widened in shock. The man was tall and lean. He wore black trousers and a black leather coat over a dark blue jumper. His hair was a shock of chocolate brown, sticking up in all directions, and freckles dotted his elfin nose.

“Well, well, Mickey,” he said with a dazzling smile, never taking his eyes off of Rose. “You didn’t tell me your friend was so beautiful.” The man reached forward, taking Rose’s limp hand in his and bringing it to his mouth, kissing her knuckles. “Benjamin MacDonald, at your service.”

Rose was looking at the spitting image of her second Doctor, wearing the clothes of her first Doctor.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor finds about about Benjamin, and the group goes on the run from the Cybermen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you probably guessed, I'm going to be relying quite a bit on the two episodes this fic is based during. I've tried to limit the amount of copy/pasting I do. Some dialogue will be directly from canon, some will be paraphrased to suit the purposes of this fic, some scenes will appear that never happened and some scenes/dialogue will be omitted entirely.

The Doctor sighed to himself as he walked away from the Countess of Sharwall. He really didn’t want to be here, but Rose had wanted to come so desperately, he couldn’t tell her no. Not that he could ever tell her no, but that was information best kept to himself. 

She had been acting differently over the past couple of weeks, and he was perplexed. It felt as if there was some connection he wasn’t making, something very obvious he was missing that might explain her behavior, but he couldn’t make heads nor tails of her lately. 

It hadn’t taken her very long after he regenerated for the two of them to get back to the way they’d been before. Rose had started joining him in the library in the evenings before she went to bed - just as she always had - after only a week back on board with him. She’d held his hand often and he’d felt bolstered, more confident in this new body that had (essentially) been created for her. That is, up until about two weeks ago. She'd been cool towards him, almost frosty at times, and he didn't understand why, since she'd been so warm to him before. Regenerations were hard on companions, and most didn’t stick around. He should have known that Rose would be different, though. Rose was so different in every way: so brave, so clever, so strong, so...precious. 

He’d been afraid that when he regenerated, the man he became wouldn’t love her the same way as the man he’d been. It had taken him less than two seconds to realize that he loved her just as much, if not more. That he’d also be willing to give _this_ life to save hers. Rose was...well, she was _everything_.

And so, even though he knew that it was a fantastically bad idea, he was milling around Pete and Jackie Tyler’s house in a tuxedo (nothing good ever happened in tuxedos), pretending to be a waiter, chatting up guests, trying to convince himself that he was there only to find out more about Cybus Industries. Simply because Rose Tyler had looked up at him through her dark lashes and smiled. 

Smitten old fool, he was. Besotted. Utterly enchanted by her. 

He sighed out loud. He’d never let a companion make such a fool of him before, and he doubted he ever would again. No one would be Rose. He could resist other people but when it came to Rose Tyler, his willpower was nil.

He couldn’t find Rose as he circulated the party, and he grew distinctly uneasy. He was never comfortable when she was out of sight on one of their adventures. And considering all that was going on: the rumors he was hearing, the parallel versions of her parents flitting around, and everyone wearing these earpods that made them freeze midstride as they had information downloaded directly into their brains... It all made him more than a bit squirmy.

Yes. He was quite ready to find his Rose and get out of this house, back to the TARDIS. 

He abandoned his tray in his search for her, figuring that his tuxedo would be a good enough cover for him to mingle with the guests while he tried to find her. He nodded his head and murmured greetings to people he passed, blending in effortlessly, keeping his eyes peeled for her. 

The Doctor passed a room with the door ajar, and a computer’s screensaver caught his eye. His search for Rose was momentarily forgotten.

A computer. Just what he needed to get to the truth of those earpods. 

He crossed to the machine and started typing. John Lumic and his company, Cybus Industries, had been a topic of discussion multiple times tonight, and the Doctor wanted to know more about the company behind the earpods. It was an easy enough hack, simple for a genius like him. After just a few moments, a video demonstration started playing on the screen. 

_’The most precious thing on this Earth is the human brain…’_

The Doctor watched in horror as the little film showed the earpods extending from the ear and upwards, rising to above the head and then meeting in the middle. 

Cybus. Cybus. _Cybermen_. 

He had to get to Rose. _Now._

~*~O~*~

Rose’s eyes darted to Mickey, then back to the Doctor... Benjamin. 

“You’re...you’re not...you’re Ben-”

“Oh, I rather like that name, coming from you. Please, call me Ben.” He smiled at her, brushing his lips across her knuckles once more before releasing her hand with a wink. Rose flushed. 

“I - I’m sorry,” she stammered. “You look just like - like someone I know.”

He gave her a cheeky grin. “So I heard. Some ‘Doctor’ of something, is that right?” 

Rose nodded. 

“I’m sure it must be very jarring for you to see me, especially if he’s as close a match to me as your Mickey is to my Rickey.”

Rose looked back over at the two men. Only the perpetual disgruntled look on Rickey’s face made him distinguishable.

“I don’t quite understand…”

“Don’t worry, love,” Ben said, smiling brightly, then took her hand again, bringing it up and patting it. “I don’t entirely understand just yet, either. But don’t fret. We’ll figure it out. I’m nothing to be afraid of.”

“M’not afraid,” Rose answered automatically - and she wasn’t. He was looking at her in a way that her Doctor hadn’t in awhile, and it was enchanting. A bit intoxicating. She looked down at their joined hands. Her hand fit perfectly inside of his, his fingers wrapped around hers in a most comforting way. 

_Gingerbread world,_ she tried to remind herself. 

Then she looked back up at him - the Doctor’s twin, Ben - and he winked at her, again. Oh, he was handsome. She went over all wobbly. 

“ _Rose!_ ” she heard behind her.

Rose turned her head towards the voice, her hand still in Ben’s, and saw the Doctor running full-tilt towards her, the jacket of his tuxedo flapping behind him. His eyes were trained on hers, and he slid to a stop in the slick grass just in front of her.

“We have to get out of here. They’re coming, the cybermen are -” He looked down at Rose’s hand in Ben’s and then up to the owner of the hand she held. He froze, and Rose could see the tension coiled within him.

“Rose,” he said in a low, quiet voice, not taking his eyes off of Ben. “That’s not me, Rose. Let him go.”

“I know he’s not,” she told him, frustrated with his highhanded manner. “S’ Ben.”

Ben offered up his free hand, but didn’t release Rose’s. Squeezed it, in fact. Rose felt her heart flutter.

“Benjamin MacDonald,” he introduced himself, offering his hand, his voice light and cheerful. The Doctor looked suspicious and didn’t take Ben’s hand. Ben didn’t seem offended. “You must be the Doctor I’ve heard so much about. It’s rather uncanny how alike we look, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” the Doctor said, still studying Ben’s face with something like a scowl. “It’s uncanny.”

Ben indicated Rose with a wave of his free hand. “Was just getting to know Rose a bit. Already met your Mickey, of course.”

“Well you can just _stop_ getting to know her, right this second,” the Doctor snapped, reaching over to break the clasped hands and pulling Rose toward him. 

“Oi!” she protested, trying to jerk her hand back. The Doctor let go of her hand only to wrap his arm around her, his grip tense and strong. Beyond that, he didn’t even acknowledge her. He merely scowled at Ben. Ben, in turn, was smirking at the Doctor’s arm around Rose’s waist with wry amusement. Rose wriggled a little to break away, but he held her firm.

She cursed his possessiveness, especially in light of the last two weeks.

“Who are you?” the Doctor demanded of Jake.

“I’m Jake, and this here’s Rickey.” He raised his hand in a lazy gesture that could have indicated either Mickey or Rickey.

“Oh, as if things weren’t bad enough, now there are two _Mickeys_?”

Mickey’s face matched his counterpart’s for the first time, and Rose finally pulled away from the Doctor, darting her eyes back to Ben. 

“I’m Rickey. He’s Mickey.”

“Right. Well. We’re leaving. Pleasure to have met you all.”

“Doctor, wait. Shouldn’t we-” Rose began, but a rhythmic, metallic sound came from a short distance away. It sounded like marching…

Ben, Rickey, and Jake looked at each other. “What the hell is that?” Rickey asked. 

“Cybermen,” the Doctor breathed and clutched Rose’s hand, tight. “We have to run!”

He took off at a gallop, Rose being dragged along behind him, and she turned her head enough to see that the other four men were following in their wake. 

She rounded the corner with the Doctor, and they both skidded to a halt when she saw the large robots. The Doctor pinwheeled his free arm in an attempt to help him change direction. Rose caught a glimpse of the other four men behind them, and hoped they would be able to keep up. 

This path was cut off by the cybermen as well, and the Doctor dashed back the other way. 

Another dash, another escape route cut off. 

There was a sound of shattering glass, and Rose turned to see the cybermen invading the Tyler mansion. People were running in all directions, and Rose tightened her grasp on the Doctor’s hand, fearing she’d be lost in the shuffle.

She spotted Pete up ahead and started waving, screaming his name. “Da- Pete!” she cried, beckoning him to come with them. Rose gave a little prayer of thanks when he did. 

“Which way is out?” the Doctor demanded to know once Pete had joined them. 

“This way!” 

The group followed, only to be cut off by another group of cybermen. The Doctor had released Rose’s hand, but she felt him take it again - before she realized that he was running a few feet in front of her. Looking down at her hand, she followed the leather-clad arm it belonged to until she got to Ben’s face. He gave her an audacious wink, still running.

If asked, Rose would have said it was impossible to blush when running for your life - but she managed it. 

The group found themselves in the middle of the yard with cybermen closing in all around. Ben clutched her hand tightly, and the Doctor spun in a circle to try to plan another escape route. 

Rickey and Jake dropped to the ground and pulled out guns, firing at the approaching robots. 

“Put the guns down!” Ben bellowed at them. 

The Doctor gave Ben a sideways glance when he concurred, also at a yell. “Guns won’t stop them!”

The cybermen drew a tight circle around them, and Rose let go of Ben’s hand to raise her own hands in surrender, automatically. 

“Hands up!” Ben commanded. “Everybody put your hands up! Don’t give them a reason to hurt you!” 

Reluctantly, Rickey and Jake dropped their weapons.

Rose saw the Doctor shoot another annoyed look at Ben before putting his own hands up. “This is a surrender.”

“There’s no need to damage us, we’re good stock,” Ben threw in. 

“ _You are rogue elements._ ” the cyberman said.

“But we surrender,” Ben shouted, pulling Rose behind him.

“ _You are incompatible. You will be deleted._ ”

“But this is a surrender!” the Doctor cried, growing angry. “Do you hear? This is a _surrender_!”

“ _You will perish under maximum deletion._ ”

The other cybermen chanted around him, _delete, delete, delete,_ and Rose looked at the group around them. _This is it,_ she thought. _This is the way I die...killed by mad robots. Not on my world, not even in my universe._

The Doctor pulled out something that looked like a plastic tea light with a green flame and aimed it at the cyberman in front of him. Green light shot out of it, then ricocheted to all of the other cybermen, evaporating them.

Rose barely had time to process what had happened when a van came skidding up behind them, directly onto the yard. Rose turned and ran towards the house, but the Doctor grabbed her by the waist and pulled her back.

“C’mon! Run!”

“My mum’s in there!”

“She is _not_ your mother. Go!” He gave her a shove towards the van, and Ben was there to catch her when she stumbled. 

“Jackie!” Pete cried, running towards the house. The Doctor ran to him and grabbed his shoulders, saying something that Rose couldn’t hear. 

Rose tried to follow, but Mickey and Ben held her back, pushing her towards the van. As she was pulled into the vehicle, Rose turned her head just in time to see the Doctor and Pete running back towards them. She heaved a sigh of relief when the Doctor shoved Pete in ahead of himself and slammed the door behind them. 

A white haired woman wrestled with the wheel, but took time to turn her head and snark at the group in the back. “Finished chatting? I’ve never seen a slower getaway in my life!”

~*~O~*~

The Doctor was annoyed to see Rose sitting between Pete Tyler and this ‘Benjamin’ character in the back of the van. He narrowed his eyes at them, but didn’t say anything. 

Mickey (or was it Rickey?) sat beside him, and he tried to focus his attention on gathering the needed information for the night that was ahead of him.

“What were those things?” Rickey demanded to know.

“Cybermen,” the Doctor said, darkly. “A little bit of technology from our home.”

“Your home?” Pete questioned. “That’s not possible. They’re Lumic’s invention.”

“Rose, Mickey and I are from a parallel universe. There are cybermen there.”

Pete looked shocked, but Rickey, Jake, and Benjamin just looked at each other. Benjamin looked smug. 

“Who are you lot, then?” Pete asked. 

“We’re the Preachers,” Benjamin said cheerfully.

Jake gave Pete a menacing look. “And we’ve been looking for you, Mr. Tyler.”

Rose protested, taking Pete’s hand. “Why him? What’s he done wrong?”

“Oh, just helping Lumic create a fleet of murderbots, it seems.”

The Doctor didn’t have time for posturing. “What exactly do you lot do?”

Jake spoke up. “We’re putting a stop to Lumic.”

“Most of the world has no idea what Cybus Industries has been doing,” Benjamin explained, “and we’re determined to save this world from themselves.” 

“No thanks to people like Pete Tyler,” Rickey snarled. 

“We have a man on the inside,” Benjamin went on. “He’s feeding us information, helping us keep tabs on Lumic.”

“Gemini?” Pete inquired in a dry tone.

Rickey raised his eyebrow at Pete. “And just what do you know about Gemini?”

“ _I’m_ Gemini, you dolt. Encrypted wavelength six-five-seven using binary nine. I thought I was dealing with experienced professionals who were working to take down this power-mad bastard. Had no idea I was working with Scooby Doo and his gang.”

“Oi!” Jake and Rickey protested. 

Mickey spoke up for the first time. “No, this lot is for real. They told me that Benjamin is London’s Most Wanted!”

Benjamin just grinned. “Oh, they like to bandy that about, but I’m only Most Wanted for parking tickets. Don’t much care for putting the car between the lines, prefer to park where I want. Dashing title, though, isn't it?” He winked at Rose, who blushed, and the Doctor felt his eyebrows furrow in anger. “Still, it’s good to know we’ve got Gemini on our side.”

“I knew you weren’t a traitor,” Rose murmured to her father.

“How’s that, then?”

“I just...did.”

The Doctor sent her a stern look, warning her silently to keep that particular information to herself. Rose looked at him then gave an infinitesimal nod and lowered her eyes. The Doctor spoke.

“I’m the Doctor, in case anyone is interested.”

“And I’m Rose. Hello!” She gave a little half-hearted wave. 

Pete scoffed. “This just keeps getting better. ‘Rose’ is my dog’s name.”

Benjamin squeezed Rose’s hand. “S’a lovely name.” 

The Doctor scowled before he turned his attention back to the matter at hand. “Pete, do you know how many cybermen have been created?”

“No idea.”

“Cybus has been stealing people off the street,” Jake supplied. “Homeless people, mostly. They get in the back of a large truck and are killed.”

“They’re not killed,” Pete contradicted. “They’re converted into these...cybermen things. He takes the living and turns them into machines.”

The Doctor shoved down his annoyance when he saw Benjamin squeeze Rose’s hand and nodded. “We need to get into the city and inform authorities. This ends _tonight_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 goes up on Monday!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor, Mickey, Rose and the Preachers are on the run from the cybermen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #sorrynotsorry

The motley crew hopped out of the van into the street, and Rose gaped at the zombie-like people wearing earpods, staring blankly ahead while they marched towards an unknown destination. 

“What’s happening?” 

“It’s the earpods,” the Doctor answered from her shoulder. “Lumic has taken control.”

“Well can’t we just…” She stepped forward, reaching to one man’s earpods but stopping when the Doctor took her wrist urgently. 

“Don’t! It’ll cause a brainstorm.”

Rose had no idea what that meant, but she didn’t question him. 

“Where are they all going?”

“Battersea. Lumic has a base of operations there,” Pete told them. 

“Right. Then that’s where we’re headed. Let’s -”

Ben’s words were cut off by the sound of approaching metal footsteps. They all looked at each other for a second, everyone’s eyes wide and afraid. Ben spoke up. 

“We’ll split up, then meet at Battersea. Mrs. Moore, take the twins with you.”

A pair of outraged ‘Oi!’s almost made Rose laugh. 

“Doctor and Jake, stick with Gemini.”

“What about Rose?” the Doctor challenged, his voice a growl. 

Rose watched the Doctor. Even in the dark, even from a distance, she could see the Oncoming Storm encroaching. His fists were clenched by his sides, his jaw was set. He didn’t look at her: his eyes and ire were fixed firmly on Ben.

The Storm was not far away at all. 

She opened her mouth to speak to him, to reassure him. She didn’t know exactly what she would say, but she had to say something. Anything.

She didn’t get a chance. Before a sound could escape her lips, a hand clasped hers. Startled, she looked up into Ben’s twinkling brown eyes. 

He gave her a mischievous grin and said one word: “Run!”

Rose glanced back over her shoulder as she ran away with Ben. She didn’t miss the Doctor’s thunderous glare. 

They ran, dodging cybermen and darting around buildings, hands still clasped. Ben looked over at her occasionally, tossing her a manic but reassuring grin, before he’d turn a corner and take them down another street or alley. 

Finally they came to a halt and Ben dropped Rose’s hand, letting her lean up against a wall and catch her breath. Her thoughts swirled as she panted. This man...this man in a leather jacket and jumper, dressed _exactly_ like her first Doctor...he’d taken her hand and told her to run, getting her away from danger just as the Doctor had so long ago. She had always felt safe with him, secure in him, and it was hard not to transfer those feelings to the man who was wearing his clothes and his successor’s face. She felt herself smile.

“You alright?” he asked, looking concerned.

“M’fine.”

“Enjoy a spot of adventure, do you?”

She gave him a bright smile. “Very much, yeah.”

Ben laughed at her. “Oh, I just bet you do. I bet you keep that Doctor of yours on his toes, trying to keep you out of trouble.”

Rose didn’t know what to say to this. He’d called the Doctor ‘hers’. She did keep the Doctor on pins and needles sometimes, but he was certainly not _her_ Doctor. Months ago, before he regenerated, the answer would have been easy. Even three weeks ago, before the krillitane and Sarah Jane, she wouldn’t have had to think twice. Now, though… 

She wondered what the Doctor would say in her place. Out of sheer possessiveness, he’d likely claim her to be his, but it would be hollow. It wouldn’t mean anything. Again, in his first body, she’d have believed him. But that was before Deffry Vale and then France. Everything had been different since then. 

He would claim her, she knew, but it would only be the alpha male in him speaking up. Not any kind of real emotion. 

“S’not _my Doctor._ He’s a friend.”

Ben gave her an assessing look. “You sure about that, are you? He seems quite taken with you.”

Rose shook her head vehemently, remembering Reinette and how he’d danced, remembering Sarah Jane and how he’d delighted in her.

“He’s not. Protective of me, is all. Feels responsible for me.”

Ben’s smile bloomed across his face, and Rose was grateful for the wall still holding her up. 

“Is it a bad thing that I look like him, then?”

Again, Rose shook her head with vehemence, denying it. “No, not at all.”

“We are quite handsome, aren’t we?” Ben preened, adjusting the lapels of his leather jacket.

“Now you _sound_ like him, too,” Rose laughed. 

Ben took a step closer to her. “Hopefully that’s not a bad thing.”

“No. S’not.”

He gave her a soft smile, a tender smile, and Rose felt herself get all wibbly. Her Doctor hadn’t looked at her like that in what seemed like ages.

“How about you, then? What’s Ben like?”

“Oh, nothing all that special about me,” he pooh-poohed. 

“I don’t believe that,” Rose told him with her tongue curled around her teeth. She didn’t miss the way his eyes followed it, and in a flash of self-consciousness she pulled it in and pressed her lips together. 

Ben seemed to notice that she was uncomfortable and explained a little about himself. “I was born in London, my parents are Sidney and Verity. Relatively uneventful childhood, unless you count my getting in trouble with teachers all the time for being more clever than them.”

Rose gave a little chuckle. She could imagine that. 

“Went to uni, got a couple of doctorates.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “So you’re a doctor, too?”

“Only in the strictest sense,” he told her. “I don’t have my M.D., just a couple of PhD’s.”

Rose snorted. ‘ _Just a couple of PhD’s_ ’, he said. As if that were nothing. 

Then again, if he were nearly as clever as the Doctor, it likely wasn’t. 

Changing the subject slightly, she asked another question. “How’d you come to be hooked up with the Preachers?”

He looked pensive for a moment before he answered. “Well, as soon as the earpods caught on, I was curious about the concept. It seemed everyone was getting them, and while I’m not usually one for new fads, I got a pair. Was on my way home when the first download happened. People just stopped moving, froze in their tracks. It was terrifying to be the only person on the Tube that seemed to be in control of his thoughts in that moment.”

“I’ll bet it was.”

Ben nodded. “So I came home and started researching. Should’ve done it before I bought the blasted things. But I found evidence that the earpods were interrupting brain activity. So I pondered it for a couple of days, bought a couple more sets of earpods and took them apart, looking for the answer. I found the mechanism for the control, but not the reason why. So I started looking for that, and ran into other like-minded people. Mrs. Moore was first. She had insider information about Cybus, and they’d come after her for it. Then we found Rickey and Jake. They’ve been invaluable.”

“I imagine so,” Rose agreed. “You seem to be small but well-organized. We’ve run into lots of freedom fighters in our travels, you lot seem to have a better handle on things than most.”

“We try,” Ben said modestly.

“I’m glad we can help you. We’ll figure this out. If the Doctor says it ends tonight, then it ends tonight.”

“You admire him a great deal.”

Rose thought for a second before she answered, pondering what she could say. “The Doctor is the most clever man I’ve ever known, and he cares about people.” _Just not me. Not anymore._

“I realize our acquaintance has been very short, Rose,” he began, taking another step towards her, tugging his ear in a heartbreakingly familiar gesture. “But...I care about you. I can’t explain it. I just feel drawn to you ...”

Rose stood paralyzed against the wall, clutching the brick behind her with her fingertips. She could honestly say the same thing; she felt incredibly drawn to the man in front of her, but she wouldn’t permit herself to verbalize it. Even though the Doctor clearly wasn’t hers, it felt like some kind of a betrayal. 

But she was drawn to Ben, and there was no question about it. She longed for the feeling of leather-clad arms wrapped around her again, to feel that strength and unconditional acceptance.

Ben seemed to notice her tension and brought his hand up to rub the back of his neck, stepping back again. The gesture reminded her so much of the Doctor that she ached a little, missing the way they used to be. 

Changing the subject, he said, “So! You lot are from a parallel world, eh?”

She nodded. “Things are a bit different there.”

“Oh?” he looked curious, cocking his brow. “How so?”

“We don’t have any zeppelins, for one,” Rose volunteered, willing herself to relax. “And there’s a Prime Minister, not a President.”

Ben quirked a half-smile at her. “How odd.”

“S’not odd,” she protested, giving him a tongue-touched smile. “S’just the way things are back home.”

“And Pete and Jackie Tyler are your parents?”

“Yes and no. They are, but m’dad died when I was just a baby in my world. It was just Mum and me. Grew up on a council estate.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

Rose shrugged. “Don’t be. I’m not. It wasn’t glamorous but it wasn’t bad, just me and Mum. I had lots of friends and stuff.”

Ben smiled at her, and it was like the sun coming out. “I’m sure you had lots of friends. You’re rather charming.”

Rose blushed. Ben held out his hand and she considered it for a moment before she took it, and they started walking through the alley together.

“How did you three end up here, in a parallel universe?”

“The Doctor has this machine, it’s a space and time machine. It takes us anywhere that we want to go. Anywhere, anywhen.”

“So you set your sights on a parallel Earth?”

Rose shook her head. “Coming here was an accident. We fell through a crack between universes.”

He pursed his lips, considering, then looked over to her with a smile and a squeeze of her hand. “I’m glad you did. I’m so glad I met you, Rose Tyler.”

She felt a jolt. The Doctor, her first Doctor, had said those exact words to her while holding her hand when they were in danger. It was uncanny.

He noticed the tension in her hand and gave her a quizzical look. “You alright?”

“Yeah. S’just something the Doctor said to me once, a long time ago. That he was so glad he met me.”

“I’m not surprised, he should be glad. How did you two meet?”

“He blew up my job.”

Rose laughed at the expression on Ben’s face at that before she went on. “There were these aliens, the autons, who could animate plastic. They made the shop dummies come to life and start killing people. The Doctor had to stop them, and I helped a bit.”

“Oh, I’m sure you helped more than just a wee bit.”

“You look like him, you know. Dress like him, rather.”

“The Doctor?”

“Yeah. When I first met him, he dressed just like you. Jumper, leather jacket, dark trousers.”

“So we really _are_ twins, then?”

She shook her head. “He looked different back then. He’s an alien, and has this trick he can do when he’s about to die. It changes his whole body, how he looks and everything.” She looked sad for a moment when she thought back to her first Doctor. Oh, how she missed his big ears and wide smile. 

Remembering that she was talking to Ben, she brightened. “I’m guessing you’re not alien.”

He laughed. “No, not alien, me. Depressingly human.”

“Nothing to be depressed about. You’re rather…” Rose didn’t finish, just ducked her head, feeling a blush staining her cheeks.

When she looked back, Ben was grinning into the distance. He didn’t seem to need her to finish.

“Does everyone call you ‘Benjamin’, then?”

He nodded. “I’ve always preferred it. Only my mum calls me ‘Ben’.”

“Oh, so I remind you of your mother, do I?” She grinned, feeling her tongue touch the corner of her mouth and noting that it didn’t bother her when Ben looked at it this time. She blushed a little.

“No, not really,” he answered after looking away. “It just...it sounded right coming from you.”

She pondered on that for a minute. She felt the same way. Everything about this man just felt...right. 

He changed the subject, and Rose was grateful to be roused from her thoughts. “So, Rose Tyler, how’d it come about that you started traveling with the Doctor and Mickey?”

“The Doctor asked me along after we got the autons sorted. Mickey is my best mate, has been since we were kids together.”

“He grew up with you?”

She nodded.

“He seems like a good man.”

“He really is.”

“And the Doctor?”

Rose thought for a second. “He’s a good man, too. Well, alien.” She thought for a minute more. “He’s different now, but still...good.”

“Is he good to you?”

 _He used to be._ The words sprung to her lips, and she bit them back just in time. Instead, she told Ben, “He’s very kind.”

They didn’t say anything for a minute, just kept walking, nearing the end of the alley. Rose looked down at their joined hands. It felt just like the Doctor’s hand, fit just as perfectly, but warmer. That seemed to be true across the board for this man beside her. He seemed to fit _her_ perfectly, but he was quite a bit warmer - even in the short couple of hours that she’d known him - than the Doctor had been recently. 

He seemed so much like the Doctor, and she was having a hard time telling the difference. The most glaring difference (other than the clothes) was the way Ben looked at her, so much like the Doctor used to…

They came to a stop at the end of the alley, standing on the streetcorner, hands still entwined. 

“So your Doctor…” Ben started, looking down towards his shoes then back up at her. “He takes you on all these grand adventures?”

“Pretty grand, yeah,” she grinned. 

“Are you sure you and he…?”

Rose was confused for just a moment, then realization dawned. “Oh! No, no, not at all. We’re not… _together_.”

“You’re sure about that?” He looked at her, his brown eyes reflecting the light from the streetlamps and shining with something else Rose couldn’t define.

She shook her head. “No. We’re not.”

“I’d guessed not...hoped not.” Ben looked away from her and tugged his ear, reminding her of the Doctor again. “Does he...does he kiss you?”

Her heart slammed in her chest, and her brain went all-over fuzzy. 

“The Doctor?”

“Yes. Your Doctor.” Ben took a step forward and took her free hand into his, playing with her fingers a little and then looking back up at her. “Does he kiss you?”

Rose felt paralyzed. Her mouth hung open and her eyes were wide, looking up into his. He looked nervous, the corner of his lip quirking up just a little in a half smile. Rose was too stunned, her thoughts too much a jumble, to smile.

“I told you,” she replied in a quiet voice, just barely above a whisper. “He’s not _my_ Doctor.” 

Ben took a step forward, the other side of his mouth rising. “Can _I_ kiss you, then?”

She was grateful that he was holding her hands, otherwise she may fall. This man wasn’t the Doctor. She knew he wasn’t the Doctor. And she _loved_ the Doctor, but she also knew that he’d _never_ return that love. He’d proven that effectively over the last couple of weeks. 

If this was her once chance to kiss the Doctor - or his parallel counterpart - she wasn’t about to turn it down. Besides, hadn’t he kissed Reinette in France? She doubted very seriously that he’d even given it a second thought before he’d snogged the French courtesan. Nothing like what she was doing now. 

Why was this even a question in her mind?

“Yeah,” she whispered.

Ben lowered his head, darting his eyes all over her face. Rose tilted her chin up, ready to meet him, ready to receive his kiss. She trembled, and wondered if he could feel it. 

“Fantastic,” he murmured.

He closed his eyes and Rose followed suit. At once, she felt his lips on hers, soft and warm, applying the lightest pressure.

She was sure she would fly away if the kiss hadn’t been grounding her. Just to be on the safe side, she brought her shaking hands up to his shoulders. Ben took advantage of the sudden freedom of his hands, bringing them to her waist and resting them there gently.

He parted his lips just slightly, not seeking to deepen the kiss, simply moving over her mouth. Rose heard a little whimpering sound, and was shocked to realize that it had come from her. Ben took this as an invitation and his tongue came out to taste her lips, just the lightest, most teasing touch. She made the little whimpering sound again, and parted her lips -

Metallic footsteps sounded in the distance, and Ben snapped to attention, tightening his hold on Rose’s waist even as he looked around frantically to find the source of the cybermen. They were coming from behind him, and she saw the first few rounding the corner, two blocks away. 

Ben ducked his head quickly and pecked her lips. “To be continued,” he promised, just before he grabbed her hand. The two took off into the night. 

~*~O~*~

The Doctor was getting frantic. He couldn’t find Rose, and he was afraid to ring her phone for fear that the ringing would alert cybermen to her presence, should she be hiding. It was too much of a risk, and he wasn’t willing to take _any_ unnecessary risks when it came to her. 

So he paced, his sharp eyes watching for her, his ears listening hard for the sound of Rose - or marching, metal feet. 

Jake was still eyeing Pete suspiciously, but the Doctor felt sure he’d come around. This Pete didn’t realize it, but they’d met before, and he knew the other Pete was brave and had been willing to sacrifice himself to save the planet. There were differences between the two men, certainly, but he didn’t doubt that when it came down to brass tacks, Pete was on their side. 

Mrs. Moore came jogging up, alone. Jake looked alarmed.

“Where’s Rickey?”

“He was behind me. The three of us got separated.”

“Well, I’m sure they’ll turn up. I’m glad you’re safe,” the Doctor told her, patting her shoulder. 

He heard a sound in the distance, and turned to find Rose and Ben running towards them, his hand wrapped around hers. The Doctor bristled, fighting the urge to rip their hands apart and drag Rose away, back to the TARDIS where she belonged. This man, this pale imitation, was getting entirely too much of her attention and the Doctor was frankly sick of it.

He schooled his features instead, letting the relief and happiness on Rose’s face soften his anger. She let go of Ben’s hand when they got close and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“You’re safe.”

“So are you,” he smiled into her hair.

Entirely too soon, Rose pulled back from him. She took a step back, and the Doctor felt a stab of white-hot jealousy when Ben reached up and took her hand. 

The _bastard!_ Rose was _his_! Who did he think he was…?

“Where’s Mickey?” Rose asked.

“And Rickey?”

“They got separated,” Mrs. Moore explained.

Jake spun around to the Doctor on his heel. “I gotta go find Rickey.”

“No! We need to wait here, they’ll be along shortly.” 

“You don’t understand, I need to -”

One of the two missing men came running up to the group, arms flailing, out of breath. He was alone. 

Jake took a tentative step forward. “There he is!” Then he paused for a second. “Which one are you?”

“I’m sorry...The cybermen...he couldn’t…”

“Are you Rickey?” Jake demanded, then took another step forward. “Are you Rickey?”

Rose spoke quietly. “Mickey, it’s you, isn’t it?”

Mickey nodded. “Yeah.”

Rose let go of Ben’s hand to step forward and hugged her old friend, tight. When she released him, Mickey turned to Jake. “He tried. He was running. There was too many of them.”

Jake turned away, gritting his teeth. “Shut it.”

“There was nothing I could do…”

“I said just _shut it_. Don’t even talk about him. You’re nothing, you are. Nothing!”

The Doctor watched Jake’s face contort in pain. “We can mourn him when London is safe.”

“And we will,” Benjamin said to Jake. “We’ll make sure the world knows he died a hero. But for now, we have to get to Battersea.”

The Doctor stepped over to Rose and took her hand before Benjamin could. “Come on. We have to go.”

~*~O~*~

The sound of marching footsteps approaching drove the group to hide behind a low wall, near some trash cans. The Doctor pushed Rose down, out of sight, where she crouched between Benjamin and Pete. He glanced over to see each man had one of her hands and was clasping it tightly. Jealousy and anger, two emotions that were becoming so very familiar to him tonight, surged within him. He knew he had to get this sorted and get Rose to safety. _Away_ from the two men who clutched her hands, the hands that held both of his hearts. 

But he had more pressing problems just at the moment. The cybermen were approaching, the pounding of metal against concrete getting louder, and the Doctor needed to ensure all of their safety. He adjusted the setting on his sonic, turning his eyes firmly away from Rose and the men bracketing her, and raised his sonic aloft. When the Doctor had sent the Cyberman away with a flick of his sonic screwdriver, they all stood. Rose dropped Pete’s hand, looking embarrassed, but held on to Benjamin’s. 

The Doctor boiled with rage.

~*~O~*~

They arrived at the waste ground just outside Battersea, and the group of heroes looked around at each other. 

“The whole of London has been sealed off. Everyone’s being led into that building to be converted.”

“We’ve got to shut it down.” Benjamin said aloud to no one.

“We can’t just go strolling up,” Jake reasoned. 

“There’s another way in. Through the cooling tunnels,” Mrs. Moore volunteered from behind her laptop. 

“Not just the cooling tunnels,” Pete supplied. “We can go in through the front doors.”

“Wha-”

“You can use these.” Mrs. Moore took a break from her computer to pull something out of her pocket. “Dummy earpods.” 

Rose reached out automatically and grabbed two of the pods. Pete reached for the other pair. 

“Rose…” the Doctor began, his hearts thudding in his chest. 

“I’m going in there, Doctor, and that’s that.” 

He felt near desperate to keep her with him, but he recognized that gleam in her eye. “Is there anything I can say to change your mind?”

She shook her head, her chin up. 

His hearts pounded impossibly harder. She’d be walking into the slaughter. The very thought filled him with abject terror. Again, the impulse to drag her away, back to the TARDIS, reared its ugly head. 

But he couldn’t leave all these people, this whole planet, to die. 

Another idea formed. “Right then. Tell you what, we’ll take out the earpods so that people have their minds back, so they don’t walk into that place like sheep. Jakey-boy?” Jake looked up at him. “Lumic is transmitting the signal from somewhere, must be over there…” He scanned with his sonic and located the transmitter on a zeppelin. “There. You and Benjamin go take it out.”

“I’m going, too.” Mickey said.

Rose looked terrified for the first time, and he tried to think of a way he could keep Mickey safe for her.

“Mickey, you can...er…”

“What? Play the lookout? Be the tin dog? No. I’m not doing that anymore. I’m going with them.”

“We don’t need you, idiot!” Jake roared.

“I’m not an idiot, you got that!? And I’m offering to _help_!”

Benjamin put his hand on Jake’s shoulder to calm him. “We’re going to need the help. There’re bound to be guards.”

“I’m going,” Mickey said resolutely.

“Good luck,” the Doctor said, feeling more warmly towards his doppelganger than he had since he laid eyes on him. 

Then Benjamin stepped forward, grabbed Rose around the waist and kissed her, hard. The Doctor gaped for just a moment, then felt his jaw and fists tighten until he had to consciously remind himself not to break the sonic. He knew he’d need it. Soon. But right now what he needed was for this pillock to get his lips and hands off _his_ Rose. 

Benjamin broke the kiss and put his head against Rose’s. “Be careful, Rose.”

Rose nodded, biting her lip, and then the three men set out across the field towards the zeppelin. 

The Doctor seethed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Preachers, the Doctor, Rose and Pete fight the Battle of Battersea, then goodbyes are said.

The Doctor strode into Lumic’s control room and nearly sank with relief when he saw Rose standing by one of the console stations. He barely stopped himself from running to her, reminding himself that Rose didn’t want him. She’d been distant and aloof for weeks, and now there was _Benjamin_. Even in his mind, he snarled the name.

Clearly, he’s what she wanted. The Doctor was old news. He wondered, almost frantically, if Rose was going to stay with Benjamin and leave him behind. 

Pushing that unbearable thought away and willing the hands that ached to touch her to behave, he stuffed them into his pockets and took on a nonchalant air. 

“I’ve been captured but don’t worry, Rose and Pete are still out there. Oh, nevermind.”

He caught the look of hurt pass over Rose’s features and softened. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she answered. “But they got Jackie.”

He desperately wanted to go to her, to take her into his arms and comfort her, but she didn’t want that. Not from him. If he were that tosser, Benjamin, maybe. He cursed under his breath.

“Then where is he, the famous Mr. Lumic? Don’t we get a chance to meet our lord and master?”

A cyberman answered him. “ _He has been upgraded_.”

“So he’s just like you?” the Doctor demanded. 

“ _He is superior. The Lumic Unit has been designated Cyber Controller_.”

A pair of doors opened and a steel throne slid out, a cyberman seated upon it. 

“This is the Age of Steel, and I am its creator.”

The Doctor tried very hard not to panic. 

~*~O~*~

Benjamin, Mickey and Jake climbed up the steep stairs to the navigation room of Lumic’s zeppelin, and started dashing around, looking for the transmitter. 

“It’s here,” Mickey called out from the other side of the room. 

“Open it, then,” Jake ordered. 

Mickey fiddled with the box and realized that it was sealed shut. 

“Can’t. We need an oxyacetylene or something.”

“Oh, and I forgot. Left it in my other pants.”

“Alright, now,” Benjamin stepped between the two men. “Let’s look for a way to get it open. Check around, there’s bound to be something. They have to be able to open it.”

The three men searched around until Mickey gasped. He stayed frozen in place as the other two came running up behind him.

“Get away from it, Mickey!”

He shook his head. “I think it’s a dummy.” Mickey knocked on the head, hearing a hollow sound. “See? Nothing in there.”

“Keep an eye on it, anyway,” Benjamin said, giving it a sidelong look.

Mickey spotted a monitor above a computer and went to it, typing quickly.

“What are you doing?” Jake demanded. “This isn’t the time for computer games!”

“I’m hacking into the mainframe, seeing if we can get into Lumic’s control room.”

“Not bad work!” Benjamin praised, clapping him on the shoulder. 

Jake let out a yelp, and Mickey turned around to see the cyberman in the corner spring to life. He tossed a glance to the transmitter and had a flash of an idea. He jumped in front of the cyberman, taunting him, curling his hands in a come-hither gesture. 

“Come on! Come on and have a go!”

The cyberman raised his fist and punched at Mickey, who ducked. He spun around to see sparks flying from the broken transmitter and the cyberman convulsing with electricity. 

“The transmitter is down!” he cried.

Jake was jumping up and down. “You did it! You did it!”

From a great distance, they could hear faint screams as people regained their mind and realized what was going on. Mickey rushed back to the monitor to continue his hack. Numbers and symbols flew across the screen above them until the monitor showed Rose, Pete, and the Doctor.

“They’re alive! The Doctor and Rose! There they are!”

“Well done!” Benjamin clapped him on the shoulder again, then let out a heaving sigh. “She’s alright.”

Mickey cut his eyes at the other man, who had his eyes trained on the screen, then went back to his work. From the monitor, Lumic spoke. 

“I bring peace to the world. Everlasting peace. Unity and uniformity.”

“You bring death and destruction, Lumic. Is that what you want? I can’t let you do that.”

“You have no means of stopping me. I have an army, a species of my own.”

“You don’t get it, do you? An army is nothing. Because these ordinary people, they’re the key. An ordinary person can change the world. Some ordinary man or woman. Some idiot. All it takes is for him to find, say, the right numbers.”

“He’s talking about me!” Mickey crowed.

The Doctor continued on the monitor. “The right codes. Say, for example, the code behind the emotional inhibitor. The code right in front of him. Because even an idiot knows how to use a computer.”

“Blimey, he’s not half a prick, is he?”

Mickey shushed Benjamin and searched for the code. 

“Knows how to get past firewalls and passwords. Any idiot can do it. Knows how to find something encrypted in the Lumic Family Database.”

“Why is he calling you an idiot? Is he always like this?” Benjamin asked with narrowed eyes.

“Used to be worse,” Mickey said dismissively. 

“An idiot could find that code,” the Doctor continued, looking at the camera, and thus looking at Mickey. “Cancellation code.”

Mickey’s hands flew on the keys, searching for the code the Doctor was asking him for. 

“And he’d keep on fighting. Anything to save his friends.”

“Doesn’t sound like much of a friend,” Benjamin observed.

“Bit of hush,” Mickey requested. Numbers started appearing on the screen, and he started the process of routing the code to Rose’s phone. 

“Lucky I got you that cheap tariff, Rose, for all our _long chats._ ” They could see the Doctor wink at Rose.

Mickey spared a glance at Benjamin in time to notice a muscle in his jaw clench. He forwarded the code to Rose’s phone and looked back to the monitor in time to see Rose reaching in her pocket for the phone. She tossed it to the Doctor and with one final, witty quip, the Doctor placed the phone in a cradle. 

The cybermen on the screen shrieked in pain, but Mickey didn’t notice. He was busy jumping up and down with Benjamin and Jake, celebrating. 

He went back to the computer, checking and rechecking to make sure the cybermen were vanquished, and Benjamin stepped up beside him.

“Hurry. We’ve got to get Rose.”

“And the Doctor, and Pete,” Mickey reminded him. 

“Yes, of course.”

Mickey dropped the keyboard and went to the wheel of the zeppelin. “We’ve got to get it lower.” He tossed his phone to Jake. “Call Rose. Get her on the phone for me.”

“I’ll do it,” Benjamin offered, putting his hand out for the phone. 

“No,” Mickey insisted, wrestling with the wheel. Rose came on the line and Mickey told her to head for the roof. “Hold on, Rose. I’m coming to get you.” The call ended.

“You can’t go any lower!” Jake exclaimed. 

“We’ve got to! Rose is down there!” Benjamin retorted. 

Mickey shot Benjamin a look. “Fallen in love with her already, have you?”

Benjamin flushed and looked away. 

“Look, mate, I know only too well the effect Rose can have on a bloke.” He turned the wheel some more, wrestling it into submission. “But you’ll never split up her and the Doctor. They’re meant to be.”

“You don’t -”

“I _do_ know,” Mickey cut him off. “They’re madly in love with each other, anyone can see it. And just because they’re having a row doesn’t mean that you can come in and take his place. He’s the Doctor. I know you don’t know what that means, but you just have to trust me. He’s the Doctor, and Rose will never leave him.” 

Benjamin’s brow was furrowed in a little scowl, and Mickey tried to hide his smirk as he lowered the zeppelin to the roof and ordered Jake to drop the ladder.

~*~O~*~

The Doctor, Rose, and Pete arrived at the TARDIS and the Doctor went inside to power it up. Pete and Rose stood outside, and Pete looked at the TARDIS speculatively. 

“So what happens in that thing, then?”

Rose gestured to the blue box. “D’you want to see?”

Pete shook his head. “No, I don’t think so. But all that stuff you said, about parallel worlds. Who are you?”

She considered him carefully for a moment, torn. She couldn’t lie to her father. Could she?

“It’s like you say. There are these...parallel worlds. And on the world we come from there’s a Pete and Jackie Tyler. And they...have a daughter…”

Pete’s eyes narrowed, then grew wide. “I have to go.”

“But wait! The Doctor could show you -”

“Thank you. For everything.”

“Dad…”

“Don’t,” he warned with a hand up. “Just...don’t.”

He turned and walked away. Rose felt as if her heart was breaking, and she couldn’t decide which was worse - watching her father die twice, or watching him walk away from her now. Her eyes filled with tears that she refused to let fall, then she heard Mickey’s voice.

“Found it!” 

She turned to find Mickey, Jake, and Ben walking up. Ben was looking at her speculatively while Mickey handed the Doctor his suit. He came to her, putting a hand out for her, then drawing it back. 

“Rose, can you speak with me for a moment?”

The Doctor called out from a short distance away. “Only five minutes of power, Rose.”

She looked to the Doctor and nodded, then let Ben put his hand on the small of her back and lead her a few steps away for some privacy. 

Before she could open her mouth, Ben spoke. “I’m not going to ask you to stay, although I wish you would.”

Rose shook her head. “I can’t. My mum needs me. She’s all alone…”

Ben smiled at her. “I’m not asking you to leave your mum or anyone else behind. I just wanted to speak to you, to look at you, just a little bit longer.”

She blinked back the tears that were encroaching. The man in front of her was… Well, she didn’t exactly know how to finish that sentence. He was...charming. Endearing. He reminded her so much of the Doctor, but all the _best_ parts of the Doctor. And when she thought of what she could have with this man…

But she couldn’t. 

If Ben noticed her turmoil, he didn’t comment. Instead, he tugged his ear before reaching around to the back of his neck to rub there nervously. 

“I just...I wanted to thank you. For everything. And to tell you that I’ll miss you. I know I’ve only known you a few hours, but…”

“Yeah,” Rose whispered. “I know.”

“Four minutes!” the Doctor called. She turned her head to glare at him, but he didn’t look at her. He was glowering at Ben. 

Ben took her hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing her knuckles. “You were fantastic, Rose. Absolutely fantastic.”

Rose let the tears fall at the words she thought she’d never hear again. He reached up and brushed her cheek, swiping the wetness across her face, clearing it. 

“Don’t cry, love. Don’t ever cry.”

“I can’t help it. You were fantastic, too. We couldn’t have done it without you.”

He smiled at her, the softness in his eyes tempting her to stay. She wished to herself she could, even as she knew it was an impossibility.

“Three minutes!” 

Rose closed her eyes and shook her head, cursing the Doctor viciously within her own mind.

“You have to go,” Ben said softly.

“Yeah. I do.”

“Go. Have fantastic adventures. And take care of the Doctor. If he’s anything like me, he...well...he’ll be grateful for it. Seems like he needs you.”

She shook her head. “He doesn’t. But my mum does.”

“Go then. Give your mum a hug from me. She raised a really great daughter.”

Rose huffed a watery laugh and nodded. 

“Well, goodbye then.” Ben leaned over and pressed a lingering kiss to her cheek, and Rose let another tear fall, wetting his lips. “Rose Tyler.”

“Goodbye, Ben MacDonald.”

He turned and walked towards the TARDIS with Rose in his wake. The Doctor eyed him up and down, but Ben didn’t seem to mind. He put his hand out. The Doctor glanced at it before extending his own hand and shaking it with more force than was probably necessary. 

“I have to say, Doctor, it’s been quite an unusual night. Never thought I’d meet a twin. I appreciate all your help getting rid of the cybermen.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Take care of our girl, eh, Doctor?”

The Doctor scowled, but Ben just smiled. 

“Goodbye, and safe travels.”

“Goodbye,” the Doctor said, then muttered something under his breath as his duplicate walked away. 

“Rose, Mickey. We have just a little over two minutes of power. We need to go, now.”

“Actually, I’m stayin’.” 

Rose jerked her head around to Mickey. “But you can’t…”

“I can, though, and I need to. There are still Lumic’s factories on the other continents, and, well, we need to get rid of them.” Rose opened her mouth to protest, and he cut her off. “Besides, Rose. My gran’s here. Remember my old gran?”

She nodded. 

“Gran needs me, I can’t leave her.”

“But what about me?” Rose wept. “What if _I_ need you?”

“Ah, you don’t need me,” he smiled a little. “It’s just you and him, innit? Rose Tyler and the Doctor. You two belong together, and I’ll just get in the way.”

Rose threw herself into his arms and he embraced her tightly. “I’ll miss you, Mickey,” she cried. 

“I’ll miss you, too, Rose.” She stepped back and Mickey reached up, swiping a tear on his own face. 

“We’ll come back, yeah?”

“We can’t,” the Doctor supplied in the softest tone she’d heard him use all night. “I have to close the crack in the universe. Once we’re gone, we can’t come back. And we have to leave now.”

“Go on,” Mickey encouraged her. “Go before you miss your ride.”

Rose’s mouth wouldn’t work. She just nodded and stood on tiptoe to kiss his cheek one more time, then went to the TARDIS. She stopped at the doorway as she was about to walk inside and looked over her shoulder to see Mickey smiling encouragingly. Her vision blurred with tears, then cleared again when they fell to her cheeks. 

She shut the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, gang, you have two options:
> 
> This story will be finished by Friday. Chapter 5, as it sits right now, is about 8k words. I can post it all in one lump on Friday, or I can post the first part tomorrow and the second half Friday. It's your call... Let me know which you prefer! Most votes wins. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor has some 'splainin to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The people who wanted two parts won by two votes, so here is Chapter 5, with a shorter Chapter 6 tomorrow! :)

The Doctor lay his folded suit on the jump seat and turned to the console, slowly flipping the switches that needed his attention in order for the TARDIS to return to the Prime universe. He wanted - needed - it to be ready so that when Rose came into the TARDIS, all he had to do was flip the final switch and they could take off... before she could run back out into the parallel world. Back out there to search for her parallel father. Back to Mickey. Back to _Benjamin._

That prick didn’t bear thinking about, although he knew Rose was likely thinking of him. For now. Soon enough, he’d be a distant memory, now that she had the _real_ Doctor back. If he gave too much thought on the other man, he’d just make himself angry all over again. Now was not the time for anger, it was the time for gratitude and comfort. Rose had chosen him, chosen _this_ life - a life with him - and the relief that flooded his body and mind with that thought left him feeling a little weak.

He was hard pressed to blame her for her reluctance to leave, though. How confused she must be, how hurt. The notion of parallel dimensions and worlds was confusing for _him_ sometimes. It must certainly be difficult for her to comprehend the idea that the parents that she’d seen and talked to were not truly her parents. His Rose was brilliant, the most brilliant human he’d ever encountered, but he couldn’t fault her one bit for struggling to make the ends meet in her mind over that, particularly when everything she’d dreamed about as a little girl was sitting here in this universe: her parents were rich; her mother was a glamorous socialite; her dad was a powerful man who led a double life as a government spy; and her lifelong best friend - the man she’d always figured she’d grow up to marry - was a brave warrior. It was every little girl’s fantasy life, out there in this gingerbread world.

And then there was... No, he still firmly refused to think of Benjamin. That wanker was gone from Rose’s life, and he would never have to worry about him again. Nor would she. There was no telling what kind of bullshit he had been filling her head with.

Rose’s gingerbread world had crumbled around her. The parallel Jackie had been ‘upgraded’, Pete had rejected her, and now Mickey, her lifelong friend, stood outside telling her goodbye. . And Benjamin…bloody-damn _Benjamin_... 

The Doctor closed his eyes and flipped another switch, whispering an unheard prayer through clenched teeth.

He had told her a few scant hours ago that the Cybermen had had their emotions removed so that they couldn’t feel. When she’d asked why, he had told her it was because emotions hurt. He’d been speaking from his own experience; the emotions he’d felt in his own life from the loss of his planet and people and the emotions he felt in relation to her had nearly destroyed him and then healed him in turn. How he wished he could cross his own timeline and cover his mouth to stop himself from saying those words now. Doing so wouldn’t change anything or make the statement any less true, but it seemed like a cruel portent in hindsight.

The Doctor heard the TARDIS’ door open then close. He heaved a sigh of relief, but didn’t look up. He couldn’t bear to look at her just yet - the slump of her shoulders, the tears on her cheeks, the grief in her eyes that would come with leaving this universe. In the very near future, he would comfort her, but he knew, intuitively, that she was not ready for him - not yet. She would spurn any offer of comfort he made right now, and he didn’t want to think about what a rejection from Rose Tyler would really feel like. He’d already had a taste of it and did not want any more. Ever.

A second, softer thud came from the doors and the Doctor risked a glance up from the toggle switches on the console. She was leaning against the door, her feet sticking out in front of her a little ways, letting her bum and the palms of both hands support her weight. Her eyes were red and her cheeks were wet, but no tears seemed to be coming at the moment. Rose stared at some point just beyond her feet, her expression blank, and the Doctor ached to go to her, enfold her in his arms, and tell her that everything would be okay, that it would always be okay because he would never let anything hurt her.

“Rose…”

“M’fine,” she murmured, without breaking eye contact with the invisible object. 

She wasn’t fine, and he knew it. This trip had been harder on her than most. Not since 1987 had she suffered such loss on one of their adventures - and this time, she wasn’t just losing her father.

He stared at her for a second longer, then, lacking his usual exuberance, flipped the last toggle that secured the doors. The TARDIS took off, her jerking and shuddering not as pronounced as usual. Rose braced herself against the door anyway, squeezing her eyes shut, two fat tears falling unchecked. The TARDIS lurched for only a moment and the Doctor braced his hands on her controls, chanting at her to please, please work, only risking a glance at Rose once he felt confident enough that everything was working as it should. 

She’d bowed her head, letting her chin rest on her chest, her blonde hair forming a swaying shield that hid her face from his view. She stayed firm against the door, refusing to enter the TARDIS fully, refusing to look at him, just allowing herself to be carried away. She had no idea where they were going; he hadn’t told her. Honestly, he didn’t know, either. His only goal was to get her away from all the pain - from everything that had been hurting her. 

And away from the temptation of Benjamin. The Gingerbread Man.

The lurching stopped and the TARDIS shuddered a final time. The Doctor pressed three buttons in rapid succession and slid a lever into place, then started toward Rose. He took his time, jamming one fist in his pocket, pulling loose the bow tie of his tuxedo and letting it dangle around his neck, then scratching the back of said neck. He watched her the whole time, blowing out his cheeks, deliberating what to say, how to say it. What would bring her the most comfort? What would make her understand? What would make her okay?

He found himself at the top of the ramp leading to the doors, his hands in his pockets, looking at her. She hadn’t moved, and the only signs of life he could see were her quietly shaking shoulders. 

The Doctor would destroy universes to keep Rose Tyler from crying, and he felt the wrath of a thousand armies welling within him. But his rage was impotent. There was nothing he could do to change the past. Now he could only try to make her feel better. He couldn’t take away the things that had hurt her - all of those things were gone.

“We’re back in our universe,” he reassured her in a soft voice. “We’re in the vortex. Stable. Safe.”

She gave a tiny sob, and he realized this probably hadn’t been the best thing to say. He chastised himself, even as he realized that he was helpless in this moment. What could he have said that could possibly have offered her comfort? What could he do to erase the sting of what she was feeling? 

He wanted to find the crack in time they had fallen through and blast it to hell for having had the audacity to exist, then blast it to hell a thousand times over for causing Rose this kind of pain. 

Rose brought her hands to her face and covered her eyes, the shaking of her shoulders a bit more pronounced. The Doctor felt his hearts break at the sight of her; the raw pain that radiated from her was so visceral he didn’t need any sort of telepathy to feel it coursing through his own body, too. He took a tentative step down the ramp, unsure how to proceed. 

Even before they’d fallen into the alternate universe, she hadn’t wanted him around much in recent weeks - not since she had met Sarah Jane and Mickey had come on board. He wasn’t sure exactly what had happened, but he _did_ know that’s when it began. On the surface, their relationship had seemed fine. To the outside world, everything had been as it always was. But the private moments between them had all but ended. She no longer joined him in the library to watch a movie and share a cuddle and popcorn, she never asked him to read Dickens to her anymore. 

The Doctor had been incredibly jealous of Mickey and cursed himself for his decision to invite the boy on board until he’d realized that she wasn’t spending any time with Mickey, either. 

The furtive glances she’d always sent in his direction in the past had turned from something like heated to almost...hurt. Confused. She had wanted something from him, and he thought maybe he knew what it was. He had thought that perhaps she wanted more from him, wanted romance, wanted _domestics_ , but now he wasn’t so sure. The silent rejection was agony. He felt the walls to the home he’d built for her in his mind crumble. 

The Doctor had set himself up for this when he’d brought Mickey on board after the Krillitanes. He'd done it on purpose. He had to know where he stood, and he had to give Rose the choice. He always gave his enemies a choice, and so he gave Rose a choice as well. She was certainly no enemy.

Well, his self-sabotage had worked and backfired at the same time. He’d hoped that she’d figure out exactly what she wanted - who she wanted - and stay with one or the other. Either to fly away with him or stay behind on Earth with Mickey. 

He’d never dreamed for a second that Mickey the Idiot would take that choice out of her hands and send her flying away with him, telling her who she belonged with. He’d never have believed that parallel Jackie would be so cruel to her, and he certainly never would have believed that he had a clone in this dimension.

And, in his arrogance, he hadn't really believed that Rose would want to leave him for Mickey. How could she? He was brilliant and could take her anywhere, anywhen.

But he'd given her a chance, and she'd been spurning him.

What if Rose resented having to return to the prime universe with him? Resented _him_? 

The Doctor pinched the bridge of his nose. None of this was even touching the fact that her father had rejected her out of hand not thirty seconds before her lifelong best friend had. 

_Oh Rose. Oh, my poor Rose. What have I done to you?_

He took another step forward, then another. Rose didn’t move, just kept her face buried in her hands as she wept softly. Finally, when he was close enough to touch her, he extended a tentative hand, his long fingers coming to rest lightly on the shoulder that was trembling beneath the black fabric of her maid’s uniform. He felt a pang of regret he hadn’t afforded her the opportunity to dress in silks and sequins for the night. She’d have enjoyed that more. She deserved to feel beautiful. 

His voice was soft, almost pleading. “Rose…”

She raised her head to look at him, her smeared makeup and red eyes completely contrasting the smile on her face. “Right then,” she declared, the false bravado in her voice incongruous with the hurt in her eyes. “Where next? When next? Ancient Mesopotamia? Some distant moon? Finally going to take me to Barcelona?” She gave a tinkling, empty laugh. 

Rose brushed by him without looking, striding up the ramp with a near-bounce in her step that somehow hurt to watch more than it had to watch her crying. He curled his fingers around the empty space her shoulder had vacated a second ago and dropped his hand to his side, following her for a few uncertain steps.

“Rose, we don’t have to -”

“Of course we do,” she insisted, spinning to look at him, freezing him in place. “We have no choice. It’s the number one thing we do, the first thing you said to me, ever. We _run_ , Doctor. We do what we have to do, then we move on. We don’t hang around. Nothing lasts. Everything ends. We leave. We _run_ in the end.” She finished, her eyes flowing again, “ _We always run_.”

He stared at her, stung by the way she’d just flung his own words back at him. Her chest heaved with emotion and his mind raced. The Doctor briefly considered attempting to communicate telepathically, but almost feared what he might find in her mind and heart if she agreed, which was unlikely. No, he couldn’t even suggest such a thing.

“Rose, I -”

“I’m going to shower and change my clothes, Doctor. I don’t have a preference where we go. Anywhere you think would be a grand adventure, just set the coordinates. It doesn't matter. I don't care. I should be ready to go in a couple of hours.”

The Doctor felt his hearts breaking for her, and he had the urge to go to her and take her into his arms, to tell her that he was still there, that he hadn’t left her, would _never_ leave her, then to thank her on bended knee for choosing him. He’d been so sure she didn’t want him anymore, but her presence clarified that matter.

Rose’s sniffling and quiet sobs hurt to hear, and the Doctor ached for her. “Rose…”

“M’going to my room. It’s been a long day, yeah?”

He didn’t debate with himself very long before he ran to her. “ _Rose!_ ”

She stopped in her tracks, her head still bowed, and he put his hands on her shoulders, turning her around.

She looked agonized, broken. Her face was streaked with makeup, her hair disheveled from the night’s adventure. He was sure that she’d be appalled by how she looked, but he thought she was the most beautiful sight he’d seen in nine hundred years. 

She’d chosen _him_.

“C’mere,” he said softly, pulling her into a hug. She relaxed into him after a moment, and he stroked her back, letting her weep against him. Her sobs shook her whole body and, by extension, his body as well. He didn’t care. He just held her steady, running his hand up and down her back, his other hand buried in her hair to hold her head to his shoulder. 

She cried as if she’d never be able to recover from the depths of her sadness, and he did his best to soothe her, rocking her back and forth a little, murmuring to her. 

“S’okay, Rose. We’re okay. I’ve got you.”

That seemed to make her cry harder, and his brow furrowed in confusion. Why didn’t she appreciate knowing she was safe? He dismissed the worry, though. She was distraught over losing her friend and her father (again), and she deserved a good cry. 

And then there was Benjamin, and what seeing his clone must have done to her. She must have been so confused, seeing and interacting with two versions of him. He tried to turn his thoughts from the idea that she’d preferred Benjamin over him. His hearts burned with the jealousy that had become so familiar over the course of this night, and he realized he’d never be able to hear that name again without it ringing bitter bells in his mind. 

Thankfully, he didn’t have to worry about that prat anymore. Rose had chosen _him_ , not his pale imitation. The Doctor dismissed him as irrelevant. She didn’t need that wanker. 

_He’d_ give her what she needed. He’d _always_ give her what she needed. 

“Thank you, Rose,” he whispered into her hair. “Thank you.”

“For what?” she asked, sniffling. 

“For coming with me. For leaving all that behind and staying with me. For choosing me.”

She raised her head from his shoulder and looked at him with wide, incredulous eyes. 

“You think I came for _you_?”

The Doctor was taken aback, unsure what to make of that. Of course she’d come to be with him, hadn’t she? She’d chosen him over Mickey the Idiot and that prat, Benjamin. Hadn’t she?”

“Wellll…” he began, his arms still loose around her. “Didn’t you?”

Rose pushed herself out of his arms with a sound that might have been a laugh, but he knew better. 

“ _No,_ you narcissistic _twat_ , I didn’t decide to come because of _you._ ”

He just stared at her, stunned. She hadn’t? Then...why?

“What? I don’t understand…”

Rose wiped her cheeks dry, glowering at him, her eyes sparking with anger. “I came back to this universe to be with my _mother_.”

“Not...not me?” the Doctor stammered. His hearts were pounding within his chest, and his stomach felt like it was plummeting to the vicinity of his feet. Fear and something else he couldn’t name hummed within his mind, shorting it out. 

Rose shook her head. “No, you idiot. Why would I come back for _you_? You clearly don’t care if I’m around.”

The Doctor was utterly nonplussed. “What on earth are you talking about? Of course I c-”

“Don’t.” Rose started taking small steps backwards, away from him, her hands up in a warding-off gesture. “Don’t you _dare_ say you care about me. Not anymore.”

He stared at her and knew that he was gaping, but couldn’t seem to stop himself. Why was she acting this way? 

The Doctor took a step towards her and Rose took two steps back, her hands still up in front of her in a defensive gesture. 

“Rose,” he soothed, the way one would talk to a spooked horse.

“Stop. Stop right there.”

“Rose, you’re not making sense…”

“I thought I was fairly clear,” she retorted. “I told you that I came back for mum, and said for you to stay away from me.”

“And you said that I don’t care about you.”

“That, too.”

The Doctor stood there, slack jawed. “How could you ever _possibly_ think that I don’t care about you?”

She laughed, a brittle, hollow sound escaping from a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. 

“How could I not? What else should I think?”

“Of _course_ I care about you, Rose!” _More than that,_ he wanted to say, _I love you!_ .

“Could’ve fooled me,” she shot, crossing her arms. “From where I stand, feels like you don’t give a damn.”

The Doctor felt his frustration rising. He brushed by her, running his fingers through his hair, tugging it.

She went on. “It’s not important, though. _I’m_ not important. Not to you. There’s no reason for me to be here.” Her lip began to quiver again, and a single tear splashed onto her cheek. “Just take me -”

“ _NO!_ ” he roared, taking a large step towards her. “ _DON’T_ say it, Rose!”

She turned her head and brought one hand up to wipe her eyes. “Why shouldn’t I?”

“I couldn’t stand it, Rose. I just couldn’t stand it if you left. You _have_ to stay with me.”

“I don’t _have_ to do anything, Doctor.”

He backtracked, blowing out a huge breath, realizing his mistake. “I thought you wanted to go on a grand adventure. But of course, I understand -”

“I don’t think you do,” she huffed, crossing her arms. 

“Rose, I…” His thoughts were a jumble and nothing was making sense. Rose had come close to saying the words that he dreaded above all others, the words he didn’t think he’d ever recover from hearing if she ever did. She’d almost told him to take her home, but he knew he never could. He _had_ to make… no, _convince_ her to stay. 

In desperation, he started racking his brain for something he could say, something he could do ...anything to persuade her to stay with him. 

First, though, he had to figure out what made her believe that he didn’t care about her. If he found that out, maybe he could solve all of both their problems. 

“Rose, I know you’re upset and angry with me…”

She didn’t offer anything in response but a huffed laugh, as if he didn’t know the half of her hurt and rage. He was starting to worry that he didn’t. 

What’s more, he wasn’t sure he _wanted_ to know. But the alternative was unthinkable. 

“I can fix this,” he implored. “I swear I can fix this.”

She shook her head. “I don’t think you can.” 

He ignored her lack of faith in him, although it stung deeply. “...But in order to make this right, I _have_ to know what's going on. You have to _talk_ to me.”

“Right at this moment, I don’t even want to _look_ at you, Doctor. Much less talk through our problems.”

“And that’s fair,” he raised his hands up in a gesture of surrender. “I understand that, and I don’t want to push you. But Rose...we’re both miserable. We can be _un_ -miserable, but not if we don’t talk to each other. Do you see? Please. I won’t ask anything of you but to explain what I did wrong and let me try to fix it.”

“You think it’ll be that easy, do you?” she spat, her eyes crackling with angry fire. “You think I can just tell you all about how you’ve hurt and belittled me for _weeks_ and then you just snap your fingers and it’ll all be better?”

The Doctor was slack jawed again. How had he belittled her? How had he made her feel like less? Rassilon knows that had never been his intention, and he couldn’t think of any way he’d done such a thing. But that didn’t really matter. Rose believed he’d done it, he’d somehow made her feel that way, and _that_ was what mattered. 

His resolve to fix this stiffened even further.

“No, I don’t think that. Whatever it is, I won’t be able to solve it all right now. And I can’t do anything about the past. I know that. But I can’t even _begin_ if you won’t tell me anything.” 

She crossed her arms, looking mutinous, but didn’t argue back. He dared to be encouraged, to hope that he was making some headway. Maybe he could get through to her. 

“Stay with me for a little bit longer, Rose. Talk to me. Let me try to make this right. If I can, we’ll both be happier and come out of this a whole lot stronger.”

He watched her carefully, gauging her response. She didn’t say anything for a moment, then gave a curt nod. He let himself feel a little bolstered.

“Now,” he began, going to the jump seat and sitting, patting the space beside him, indicating she should sit by him. She gave him and the offered seat a fulminating glare and again, he raised his hands in surrender, giving up quickly.

But he pressed on. “You mentioned that I’d belittled you over the last couple of weeks...”

“I did. Because you did.”

“Well, before I say anything else, let me just apologize. I never meant to make you feel that way, and I deeply regret having done so.”

“Sorry doesn’t fix it.”

“I know it doesn’t, but I’m trying,” he reasoned, feeling his patience fraying. “Just let me get to the root of this, please.”

Rose gave him another short nod, then looked away. 

“Thank you. Now, this is the part when I need you to fill in the blanks. When was the first time I belittled you and made you feel like I didn’t care?”

She didn’t look at him when she answered. “Deffry Vale.”

“Deffry - the high school? With the Krillitane?”

Rose nodded and he thought on that for a moment. Sarah Jane had been there, of course, and he knew that the two of them had gotten off on a rocky start, but he didn’t see why she would feel less because of that. He’d practically declared himself to her on the pavement outside of that chippie, for Rassilon’s sake! How could that be seen as anything other than what he’d meant it as?

“Tell me what I did at Deffry Vale.” His tone was gentle, pleading, but still a command. 

“Where do I start? First, you made me dress as a dinner lady…”

“That was the only way I could keep you with me!” he protested.

Rose scoffed. “Oh yeah, like you couldn’t have flashed the psychic paper and had me hired on as a secretary or something?”

“I -” He hesitated, trying to remember the train of his thoughts when he’d made her don the lunch lady uniform. It had certainly worked out to their advantage that she’d been stationed in the kitchens, but could he have gone about it in another way?

A small voice inside him said that yes, he absolutely _could_ have accomplished everything during that adventure without doing what he’d done. He _could_ have made her feel more like what she was - the most important woman in his universe. 

“I’m sorry, Rose. I don’t know what I was thinking - well, I have an idea - but I was wrong.”

“You thought that was the best job for a chav like me?”

“No!” he cried, outraged. “I never -”

She sniffed, still not looking at him, her arms crossed. 

“Rose, you have to know that’s not how I see you, how I think of you. Not at all. And I really am sorry.”

She waved a hand at him that was probably meant to be dismissive. “Forget about that. It’s not important. That’s _not_ the biggest problem I have with the way you’ve been treating me, not by a long shot.”

The Doctor cringed. Rose rarely took this tone with him; he rarely received this kind of censure from her, and he wasn’t sure what to do with it. It made him distinctly nervous, and he cursed himself for whatever it was that he’d done to earn her displeasure with him. 

She seemed to follow his train of thought. “You really have _no idea_ what you’ve done, do you? You’re totally at a loss as to why I’m angry.” 

He looked at her helplessly, and she shook her head before she buried her face in her hands. “I’ve no idea if that makes everything better or worse.”

“Please tell me... What else did I do, Rose?” he implored. 

She raised her face from her hands and looked at him. “If it’s not important enough for you to remember, then it’s not important enough to matter. Goodnight, Doctor.”

He leapt from his seat and was by her side in a flash, his hand on her bicep with a loose but firm grip. 

“Wait, Rose,” he started, but she jerked to free her arm. 

“Don’t touch me,” she hissed, even as tears fell. He dropped her arm like it had burned him. 

To control the urge to pull her to him, to hold her tight in his embrace until she never doubted him again, he put one hand in his pocket and rubbed the back of his neck with the other. 

“M’sorry, I just…” the Doctor began. Rose watched him warily and he found his words. “I just...there’s nothing I want more in this world or any other than to make this better so we can go back to the way we were.”

“The way we were,” she echoed.

“Yeah,” he nodded, encouraged. “You remember, don’t you? Walking into new worlds together, holding hands, both of us knowing it was better with two? Chips on every planet that had potatoes? Tea every night before bed…”

“All of those things were wonderful, Doctor,” she agreed. “But that time is past. It died nearly at the same time you did. For a while after you regenerated, I thought… I’d hoped…” She tripped over her words and the tears continued to fall. “Things seemed to be...a lot like what they had been. You still seemed to care. But I guess that died, too.”

The Doctor furrowed his brow in confusion. “I didn’t die, Rose. You know that.”

“You _did_ die,” she shouted, taking a step away from him, her eyes flashing. “You went up in a column of fire and there was no more Doctor! Not the one I knew, not the one I loved.”

Rose wrapped her arms around her torso, giving herself her own, private hug in an attempt at comfort. He tried to make sense of what she was saying, but anger was starting to creep into his thoughts. He fought to keep it down and away. 

Then her last words struck him, and he felt his hearts lighten. He was completely unable to fight down a little smile.

“You love me?” 

She cast him a look that he didn’t quite understand. “ _Loved._ Past tense. How could I love someone who doesn’t care about me? The you that loved me back caught fire and burned right in front of me.”

“That’s just not true, Rose!” he cried. “How could you ever think -”

“How could I _not_?” she demanded with a raised voice. “If you had just stuck me in the lunchroom, that would have been fine. I’d’ve had bruised feelings, but I’d’ve gotten over it. No big deal. But it wasn’t just that, was it? We met Sarah Jane and you let her talk to me like…”

“Like what?”

“Like I was some child, some charity case. She called me your assistant!”

“You’re _not_ my assistant, Rose! I mean, yes, you assist me, so in the strictest sense of the term -”

“She talked to me like I was _less_ , Doctor. She talked to me the way all of the fancy women who came into Henrik’s did when they heard my accent and realized I was a chav from the estates.”

“You’re not a chav from the estates! You're so, _so_ much more than that! And I don’t care what anyone thinks!”

“Well, she made me feel like one,” Rose insisted. She wiped her eyes and recrossed her arms, not meeting his gaze. "And you let her."

He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Rose. I’m so sorry. She was angry with me and took it out on you. It was wrong of her.”

“That’s right, she was angry with you. And do you know _why_ , Doctor?”

“Because I left her and never came back,” he answered, his voice dull.

“Yeah,” Rose snarked. “You left her and never came back.” 

“But I told you, Rose. I told you I wouldn’t do that. Not to you. You’re special.”

“Sarah Jane thought she was special, too.”

“And she was. Sarah Jane was a great friend and companion. But she wasn’t _you_ , Rose. She could never be you.”

Rose snorted. “You left her behind, swore you wouldn’t do that to me, and I tried to believe you. I _tried._ I went to bed that night trying to convince myself that you wouldn’t. But you _did_.”

The Doctor was nonplussed. She was right there with him, right this moment. How did he leave her?

She must have seen the confusion on his face, because she snorted again, derisively. “You’re still not getting it. You still don’t understand what you did.”

He looked at her with wide, helpless eyes. “Please tell me.”

“Oh, I’ll tell you, alright. If you want to talk about this, fine. Let’s talk about it.” She took a deep breath. “You promised me you wouldn’t leave me on the pavement outside of that chippie, and then the _very next day_ , you left me on a space station while you rode off on your noble fucking steed through a plate glass window to rescue _her._ ”

Realization dawned. “Reinette.”

“Yeah. Reinette,” she snarled. “You had no way back and you _knew_ it! You _knew_ that was a one-way trip, and yet you _left_ me!”

He started towards her, but she stepped back away from him, recrossing her arms in a protective gesture. He stopped when he saw her defensive stance and ran his fingers through his hair again, ruffling it as he blew out his cheeks in frustration. 

“I handled that poorly,” he admitted, keeping his eyes averted from the anger and tears sparkling in Rose’s eyes. “I did. I was wrong and I’m sorry.”

“I thought you were gone,” she said in a watery voice.

“I wasn’t. My fifth incarnation went to Paris two years later. I knew I could hitch a ride back to you with him, and be there just a few minutes after I left. I was _always_ coming back to you, Rose. I meant what I told you outside the chippy. I’ll never leave you behind.”

“I can’t trust you,” she whispered, sounding broken. “I can’t believe you anymore.”

He threw his arms up in the air and spun around once, beseeching any and all of the gods to help him before he turned back around to her. “What’ll it take, Rose? What’ll convince you?”

“I don’t know.”

“Tell me,” he begged. “Tell me what to do and I’ll do it. I’ll do it right now, and I’ll do it over and over again until you believe in me again.”

“I can’t even remember the reason I’m here anymore. Sometimes I think it must just be habit, or the fear of returning to my old life. But beans on toast is better than feeling like this.” She heaved a sigh. “Take me-”

“ _NO!_ ” he shouted, just barely refraining from covering her mouth with his hand. “Not that. _Anything_ but that.”

“You lived nine hundred years without me. You’ve proven over the last couple of weeks that you don’t need me, don’t want me. Why -”

She didn’t get to finish. Quick as lightning, he crossed to her and kissed her.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor and Rose finish their conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, a couple of notes.
> 
> You guys are the absolute BEST. Thank you so much for reading my little story, for your kudos and comments. You guys make writing an absolute joy (and addiction!). 
> 
> This prompt was _amazing_ , and I'm completely honored to have been asked to write it. Thank you, Cherazor!
> 
> Tenroseforeverandever is an amazing beta, and whips me into shape. Thanks, love.
> 
> Enjoy the conclusion!

The Doctor was kissing her. She was tasting his lips, his arms were around her, and he had one hand buried in her hair. It was like a dream come true.

She’d never felt anything like this: his passion was overwhelming her. His lips were hard and insistent against hers, moving restlessly over her mouth. They opened and he brought his tongue into play, teasing her bottom lip with it, begging entrance. She was lost in a swirl of sensation, of shock and disbelief. Acting purely on instinct and long-held desires, she parted her lips for him.

As soon as she granted him access, the Doctor gentled himself, barely dipping inside. Rose gloried in his taste...he tasted just like he smelled. He tasted of tea and comfort, of musky spice and time itself.

He brought both hands up to her cheeks, cupping them. His thumbs caressed her face, and Rose felt awash in love, hope, and desire. 

She had no idea how long he kissed her - or how her arms came to be around his neck - but she did notice when he slowed the kiss down from one, long, thorough snog into chaste, little, sipping kisses. He broke away, his hands still on her face, and Rose opened her eyes to him. 

He was just far enough away that she didn’t have to cross her eyes to see him. His fair cheeks were flushed, masking his freckles. His lips were parted and moist, and she fought down the desire to kiss him again. But his eyes...his eyes were blown wide, the smallest ring of chocolate brown surrounding his black pupils, and he searched the face he still held, staring into her eyes. 

“I don’t want to live without you, Rose. I don’t think I could; I think it would kill me. Please don’t make me try. Please,” he begged. 

Rose felt her own eyes prick with tears, and in that moment she was ready to forgive him anything, to follow him anywhere. 

He put his forehead against hers. “I love you, Rose Tyler.”

The words were like cold water, and she jerked a little in response. She pulled her head away from his, staring at him, blinking once.

All at once, the last two weeks came rushing back and invalidated his words. The feeling of rejection, the way she’d felt like a pathetic hanger-on, the nights she’d cried herself to sleep...

It was a total shock to them both when her hand connected with the side of his face. 

The Doctor staggered backwards, clutching his cheek. “The hell was that for?” he demanded. 

Rose huffed and turned away from him, her hands balled into fists while she gritted her teeth against the anger that threatened to wash her away. Then she turned back to him, feeling her color rising in her cheeks. “You...you...you arrogant _prick_! You don’t get to say something like that to me, after what you’ve done! You don’t get to snog the stuffing out of me, tell me you love me, and expect everything to be miraculously better!”

“So your response is to slap me? I tell you I love you and you hit me! The hell, Rose!?”

“You’re not going to make this better with one kiss and the three words I’ve been _dying_ to hear since Downing Street! I’m furious with you!”

“I hadn’t noticed,” he said in a dry tone, finally releasing his cheek. 

Rose stomped away a few steps, bringing her fists to her forehead and squealing in frustration. “You didn’t mean it, so why did you do it? Is it just because you’re jealous of Benjamin?”

“Don’t bring that...that _pillock_ into this!”

She spun around to him. “It’s true, though!”

“I didn’t have an ulterior motive for that kiss, Rose. And I don’t have any reason for telling you I love you except that I do, and I want you to know it.”

“If you loved me, why would you snog Madame de Pompadour?”

“I didn’t...that’s not…”

Rose crossed her arms and cocked her hip. “You’re saying you _didn’t_ snog her? So you were lying when you came back through the fireplace crowing about how you’d snogged the uncrowned queen of France?”

“No, that’s not…”

“Did you or didn’t you, Doctor?!”

“She...I didn’t… She snogged me!” he protested.

Rose made a derisive sound and looked away from him. “Not a very sturdy defense, there.”

“She _did_ , Rose. She backed me against the fireplace and snogged me!”

“And you let her!”

He just stared at her, and she had all the answer she needed.

“Thanks, Doctor. You love _me_ , but you snog _her_. Makes total sense.”

“You snogged Benjamin!” he accused.

Rose gave him a sneer. “Yeah. I did. And what do you care?”

“ _I love you._ Why wouldn’t I care that some unworthy bastard had his lips on you?!”

“ _He reminded me of you!_ ” she bellowed, then covered her mouth with her hands. The Doctor stared at her, stunned, and tears spilled over onto her cheeks. “He reminded me of you.”

The Doctor’s voice was quiet, measured, when he spoke. “He looked just like me, Rose, but that doesn’t mean he was like me.”

“He was, though. He reminded me of the way you used to be. Before.”

“What do you mean, ‘before’.”

“The way you were before Deffry Vale. Before you regenerated. Ben, he…” She paused, trying to gather her scattered thoughts. “He reminded me of what we used to have. Of what you used to be. I thought…I just... Look, I know that if you had never changed, none of this would be happening. And I had thought that you were still the same...I _wanted to believe_ you were still the same! Things seemed to be just like they were in Scotland and then in Rome. Maybe even better! 

“But then we went to Deffry Vale, and then France and...you just proved me wrong. I was so wrong. Before you changed, you were completely different. You _never_ would have let Sarah Jane talk to me that way before you changed! And you certainly never would have snogged a French tart!”

The Doctor didn’t seem to want to talk about his past misdeeds anymore. “So you want the old me. That’s what Benjamin represented to you? He reminded me of what I was before? Tell me, Rose. Was it the fact that he was dressed like me? He wore the leather and jumper like I used to?”

“No,” Rose said miserably. “That wasn’t…”

“Because if that’s it, I’ll march straight down to the wardrobe room and put that jumper and jacket on right now. I’ll do it, Rose, for you, if that’s what you want from me. If that’s what you need. I’ll do anything to be what you need. Whatever you want, I’ll do it.”

“It wasn’t that, it wasn’t some stupid clothes! It was all of it! He made me...he made me feel _special_. Clever. The way you _used_ to.”

“Rose,” he began, rushing forward to take her hands. “I’m still me. And I’ve made some mistakes, but I’m still me. I’m still the man you loved.”

“Hasn’t seemed much like it.”

“I’m so sorry, Rose. I’m so sorry that I made you feel the way you’ve felt. I’m so sorry that I wasn’t what you needed, what you wanted. Tell me what you want and I’ll make it better, I swear. And I was serious about the jacket. If you need that reminder of the old me, I’ll go get it right out of the wardrobe room right now.”

“It’s not there,” Rose sniffled. The Doctor looked at her in confusion, so she clarified. “I have it. It’s in my room. I wanted...I wanted to remember him. You.”

He was silent for a few moments before he spoke, rubbing his thumbs over the backs of her hands. “So what you’re saying is that you _do_ want to go back to the way we were, but I need to change. Need to be a little more leather, a little less pinstripes.” 

Rose nodded. “I’ve missed you. I’ve just...I’ve just missed you, Doctor. And I missed you just after you changed, but I hoped you were still the same. The past two weeks have told me that you’re _not_ , and I’ve just... missed you so much.”

The Doctor dropped her hands and opened his arms. She went to him after a moment’s hesitation, wrapping her arms around his waist and letting the tears fall. “I’ve missed you, I’ve missed what we were, what we had.”

“I swear to do better, Rose,” he said, and she felt a little kiss press into her hair. “I’ll be better. I’ll be a better man, for you. I swear.”

Rose just nodded against his chest. 

“Do you believe me?”

“I’m not sure. I’ve been so hurt...just so hurt, Doctor. I told myself that the feeling’s dead, that what I felt for you was all gone. But who’s fooling who inside my head, you know?”

“I want nothing more than to prove to you I’m still what I used to be. When I saw you with...with _him_ , it felt just like it did with Mickey and Adam. More than that. I thought I’d lose my mind when he kissed you.” She could hear a little grin in his voice. “My leather self was out in full force tonight.”

Rose just sniffled.

The Doctor took a step back and lifted her chin to look at him. “I know a lot of things, Rose Tyler. I know that when you look at me, when fix your beautiful gaze on me, I feel like I could do anything. I know that all I need is you in my corner. I need you with me. And after tonight, I know that you’re numb from all the things you never heard from me. I promise to make that right.”

Rose nodded, looking away from his eyes. He turned her back around to face him. “I’m going to ask two things of you. Alright? Just two things. I’m going to ask you to stay with me - just for a while. Give me a chance. Stay in my corner. Give me that advantage. Can you do that?”

Rose nodded, still miserable. The Doctor looked down at her, and his eyes were hopeful. Wary. “Do you still feel anything for me, Rose?”

She couldn’t lie to him, so she nodded. “Sometimes...oh I don’t know how to put it into words.”

“Give me whatever remains of your love. I swear that if you’ll let me, I’ll earn the rest of it back.”

Rose looked into his eyes, and saw the sincerity there, the plea for her to give him a chance. For just a moment, they were blue and not brown and she swore she could smell leather. She wanted what they’d had back, and she wanted more. She wanted to know that she owned his hearts. She wanted to know that he would love her, and that he wouldn’t do it again. She wanted to be his and only his. She wanted him to be hers and only hers. But…

“I’m still hurt, Doctor. I’m still angry and confused.”

“I know, love. Please just give me a chance, precious girl.”

Rose let out a little sob. “You haven’t called me ‘precious girl’ since…”

“Since before. I know. I wanted you to get used to the changes in me. I wanted you to want that from me. I think part of me sensed that you weren’t completely convinced that I’m still the man I was, when I was still all ears and nose and leather.”

She huffed a little laugh and drew her hand across her face to wipe her tears away. “I loved your nose and your ears. Loved them. But...it’s not just looks. You’re so different.”

“I know this is confusing, love. I’m different, yes. But all of the important things are still the same. Please, please give me a chance to prove myself.”

Rose nodded. There was nothing else to do. She loved him and wanted him, and if he really _was_ still the same, denying him that chance would only hurt both of them. 

“Okay.”

“You will?”

“Yeah. But you need to understand that I’m still so hurt, Doctor. This isn’t going to correct itself overnight. You can’t just point at this with the sonic and fix it. It’s going to take time.”

The Doctor pulled her into a crushing hug, planting kisses on the side of her head. “I know. I know it’ll take a while. But I’ve got time. I’ve got all the time you’ll give me. I love you, Rose, and I swear I’ll do anything to make you believe me.”

“Okay.”

She heard his voice brighten. “I’ve got an idea. What say we go to a pleasure planet. A resort, eh? Rassilon knows you could use some R&R after the last couple of weeks, yeah?”

“Actually, I want to go home.” She felt his arms harden around her, his chest tense under her cheek. She hastened to explain. “Not to stay - well, not to stay _long_. I just need to see my mum, need to be with her for a while.”

The Doctor relaxed against her, then stood back from her and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Your wish is my command, precious girl.”

Rose felt her heart flutter against her will and gave him a weak smile of gratitude.

“Go. Get showered and changed. When you get back, we’ll be ready to land right in your mum’s flat.”

“Okay. Shouldn’t take long.” 

The Doctor nodded, but Rose missed it. She turned on her heel and stumbled off towards her room. 

~*~O~*~

The Doctor could hear the one and only thing he treasured in the universe other than his frankly magnificent ship sobbing brokenly as she closed her bedroom door behind her. The sound was heartbreaking, but behind the regret and sorrow for hurting her, he felt a bright, shining hope.

Rose was going to give him another chance. He didn’t deserve it and he knew it. But she was giving it to him, and he was going to grab it with both hands and never let go.

There had been two other men who had jockeyed with him for the title of ‘Most Important Man In Rose Tyler’s Life’, and now they had just walked _out_ of her life within moments of each other. The Doctor wouldn’t entertain the idea that Benjamin ever had a shot at that title. That left him, the Doctor, behind to take the top spot. She’d come to him, she’d come _with_ him, and she didn’t have to. He knew now that he wasn’t the reason she’d come onto the TARDIS, and he may not have been any part of the reason. 

But he was determined to be the reason she stayed. 

He’d stood by and watched as the other men who had competed with him to be the most important man in Rose’s life had swanned off. He’d been there when they’d left and he was going to make the most of that. The Doctor was going to prove to her that he could be a rock, eternal and strong. That the Time Lord who was the Oncoming Storm to the rest of the universe could be a safe harbor for Rose Tyler. He was…

He was not what she deserved. He just wasn’t. She deserved better. Rose deserved so much better than him. He knew it.

He turned back to the console and leaned back against the jump seat, scrubbing his hands against his face. They’d done all the talking they could do for right now. There was plenty left to say, but not now. It could wait. She may have been looking at him, but she had been talking to herself for at least part of it. 

She needed comfort, but not from him. She had a lot to get out, but not to him. Not right now. 

She needed her mum.

The Doctor raised his eyes heavenward and muttered under his breath about what a fool love had turned him into, then blew out a huge breath, set the coordinates so he’d only have to flip the switch when Rose was ready, and went to his own bedroom to shower and change.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A year ago (almost to the day), I started writing a Doctor and Rose story that picked up when they boarded the TARDIS and flew away from Pete's World. The Doctor set out to prove himself to Rose, and this story chronicles that. It's long: about 20k words and not yet complete, but I'm working on it. 
> 
> I'm going to be posting it as a sequel to this story. So...be on the lookout for that in the next couple of months. :)
> 
> Thank you all again!!


End file.
